Talk To a Pastor Online

Christian Counseling Online for College Students - Senior Pastor Online On Duty 7 Days a Week

2012-02-13T08:31:00.000-08:00

In a recent USA Today article by Martha Irvine entitled College Mental Health Screening going High Tech, it is revealed that "Many centers are more swamped than ever, college therapists say, particularly at this time of year, in the frenzy of final exams and job searches."

The article states that there's debate about why there are more students seeking services, but there is agreement on the fact that there is an increase in demand.

Hello, my name is Roland. I am a pastor and counselor. I know something about college life (even though I'm old) because I lived in a college dorm for 4 years during my undergrad days when I was 18 to 22 years old. Then when I was in my 30's I went back to school for my Masters Degree. Then I taught university courses for 20 years, was a college school director for awhile and did some student advising. Now I spend my time talking and chatting with people.

I am also the co author of Mike's Story - How I Overcame Depression, Anxiety, OCD and other Issues Without Drugs. Mike's story is inspirational. He fully recovered from what today would be labeled disorders and syndromes and went on to a happy and productive. He begins his story when he was a kid, then a college student, then a young guy in his 30's, and then a middle aged guy in his 50's.

I tend to agree with what Mike had to say about college. He said: "All I can say is that today's college students are kinda on their own when it comes to solving problems and repairing issues."

Kinda on their own. Their parents are often well meaning and nice, but sort of unaware when it comes to many issues. Sometimes it's the mere fact that parents are miles removed from what is going on.

It is a continuation of their pattern of , having continued the legacy of just dropping their kids off at pre school, daycare, over nighters, school, after school, soccer practice, and finally the college campus.

They are in the habit of dropping their kids off somewhere. So dropping them off at college is just the latest drop off. The parents ASSUME, all the while that there will be proper supervision and that everything will be okay.

Unfortunately, this is all too often not the case.

Often the parents have issues themselves and so they don't have the solid strength (like an old oak tree) to speak with authority and understanding. They defer to experts, health care workers, counselors, and administrators who arrange for resources in the form of offer high tech and meds.

Don't get me wrong. If I show up at ER with a broken arm, I want high tech.

But if I need some guidance for an emotional issue I'm dealing with (like a boyfriend issue, school pressures, or wondering what I'm going to do with my life) I need someone more like a really good grandpa or grandma.

Better yet, a father who is there for me. But, and I say this with all due respect, not one who's going to appointments every month for a variety of issues himself or who has a cabinet full of meds. Sorry, but he's just not credible.

College students often turn to each other for help. Their friends are usually nice and supportive, but as nice and as smart as they are, they don't have the wisdom of years.

It used to be you could read Ann Landers or Dear Abby. They had common sense, but they are gone. All I can say is that there are still people out there who are strong, noble and aware. They have love and understanding. They can give you some tips, shed some light in the cause and solution for your issue and how to use your resiliency to quickly get back on your feet and move forward without becoming dependent on them. But finding them is not always easy.

Parents need to be involved, aware, and informed. Grandparents need to step up. When all is said and done, you are safer with a decent parent or grandparent than with some stranger. And don't forget the value of autobiographies and memoirs of noble people from the past.

I recall a particularly gloomy period in my life when I was in my 20's. I felt all alone, listless, and didn't know what I would do. I was in a big city at the time where I felt like a stranger. One early morning when I couldn't sleep I was listening to a big talker radio station. The host was interviewing a someone.

I became wide awake. The clarity and the honor of this man shone forth unmistakably in just these few words.

It was Vice Admiral James Stockdale. He spent six years in a prison camp where he was tortured. He wrote a book about his experiences called A Vietnam Experience. In it he writes about college, leadership; and his love for the liberal arts, literature, and music.

Just knowing that a noble and thoughtful man like him existed somehow at some deep level gave me hope and the courage to move forward. Someday, you, the young person or college student, may become that type of noble person yourself for others.

A wise person said "This too shall pass." Believe me, I've had plenty of bumps in the road of life. But here I am.
___________________

I heard a great interview on FamilyLife Today on the radio. Dennis Rainey interviewed Mary Kassian. Her book Girls Gone Wise in a World Gone Wild is a must read for every young lady and parents too.

The interview was riveting. She emphasized the importance of setting pre established protective boundaries, so as to avoid getting into a compromising or unsafe place in the first place. She gives plenty of examples. Preview at Amazon Click here to listen to the interview.

Yesterday I heard another great interview on NPR Radio's On Point Program. If you have daughters (or sons) away at college or are contemplating sending them off to college, you must listen to this interview.

When you listen to this riveting interview you will hear from two ladies who have the stories, the facts, and the analysis that every parent with college age or soon to be college age kids will want to listen to.

For example, these ladies talk to college kids all across the country and here is what they repeatedly hear. They hear of rape and other bad things happening to women on campus. They also hear of hostile atmospheres that no one seems to be doing anything about.

For example, they said that the girls they talk to are telling them that when girls are walking around the campus they see boys looking at really heavy duty degrading things to women on their computers--openly, even in the common areas. They emphasized that this is not unusual or isolated, it is common.

One of the ladies made the comment that there is something wrong with the college culture when the morning after the night before, one person feels guilty and used and the other is getting high fives.

Of course, every school will say they are taking it seriously, that there are policies and there are administrators and counselors and training, etc. But something doesn't add up. The statistics for rape on campuses, according to these ladies, are telling. Something is wrong. Best to become informed. Hear what these ladies and others have to say, and then make an informed decision.

I read a book by Campus psychiatrist, Dr. Miriam Grossman MD, entitled Unprotected, and it alerted me to think twice about just sending kids away and assuming that the level of care, protection, and supervision will be what you would want for your child.

Today you hear of many young people who are moving back in with their parents while going to college. Sounds like a good idea to me.

I've heard the argument made that letting kids come back home is coddling the kids, overprotecting them and so on. But you know what--if it means that your son or daughter is safe from being assaulted, then I'm in favor of kids staying safely with their parents a little longer.

The Benefits of Christian Meditation by Roland Trujillo, the World's Foremost Expert on Christian Mindfulness Meditation

2012-02-12T18:29:00.001-08:00

From the world of sin and noise
And hurry I withdraw;
For the small and inward voice
I wait with humble awe;
Silent am I now and still,
Dare not in Thy presence move;
To my waiting soul reveal
The secret of Thy love.

Charles Wesley.

When therefore the smallest instinct or desire
of thy heart calleth thee towards God,
and a newness of life, give it time and leave to speak;
and Take care thou refuse not Him that speaketh.
Be retired, silent, passive,
and humbly attentive to this
new risen light within thee.

William Law.

Pastor Roland's comments:

Both of these men get it.

Most of us are first lost in the distractions of the world, and then we are lost in the squirrel cage of thinking and feeling. We relive the past and plan and worry about the future. The benefit of the true meditation is that it teaches a person how to be still. It teaches a person how to be in the world but not of the world and how to observe thought without being lost in thought.

Of course we have to work, visit with others and so on. But we must learn to do so without getting caught up in the emotions and distractions.

And we must learn to go into our room and practice being still.

Most importantly, we must learn how to observe thoughts (most of which are negative) without struggling with them or trying to suppress them. Just watch them, like observing a blaring TV at the other end of the room with a bad grade B movie; it's not even credible, so you don't pay attention--just let it go in one ear and out the other. Click on the meditation Tab above to listen to a free introductory version of the meditation. It teaches you how to be still.

Dr. Roland Trujillo MS D Pastoral Psychology, BCPC is the author of 12 books and world's leading authority on Christian mindfulness meditation.

Hispanic Pastor Host of Talk to a Pastor on KCAA Radio Reaches Out to Southern California

2012-02-12T18:00:00.000-08:00

Hi, my name is Pastor Roland. I am a Senior Pastor and a Pastoral Counselor. I host Talk to a Pastor on KCAA 1050 AM Sunday mornings.

I love the people in Riverside, Colton, San Bernardino, Hemet, and LA too! Listen to me on the radio and if you want to talk to me, I'm now available online too.

I offer two service options.

Pay per minute. I offer professional pastoral counseling 7 days a week for personal issues and feedback via texting, phone, and email at LivePerson. Great for people who want to ask a quick question for advice. Great for people who want to be in control of how long the session is. Great for people who want to be anonymous. For more information about Pay per minute, scroll down this page.

Please note: consulting with Roland is definitely for you if:

You wish to remain anonymous (LivePerson does not reveal the client's name, phone or email address to the counselors)

You wish pay as you go, so you can consult a little at a time or so you can test the waters and get started for a small amount. For example, at the current fee of $1.00 per minute, a 10 minute session is only $10.00. (fees are subject to change)

Pastoral counseling for a donation. Best value for people who want to chat several times or for multiple email exchanges. Click on the Counseling for a Donation Tab for more information.

Here are just a few of the issues I've been talking to people about for 21 years:

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in, solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues.

Relationship and marriage issues

Courtship, choosing the right partner

Help with marital unhappiness or infidelity issues

Feedback on depression, bipolar, OCD, and anxiety from a pastor's perspective

Help overcoming drug and alcohol issues

Overcoming emotional issues, such as unhappiness, upset, anger, or anxiety

Letting go of doubts and fears

People who don't want a record of their issue following them around.

Parenting issues, blended families, single parenting

Religious questions you've always wanted to ask

Questions you would like to ask a pastor even though you are not involved in any religion.

How to cope with stress from a pastor's perspective

Overcoming feelings of inferiority or insecurity.

Executives, clergy, actors, prominent people, entertainers, attorneys who want confidential counseling

I offer two service options.

Pay per minute. I offer professional pastoral counseling 7 days a week for personal issues and feedback via texting, phone, and email at LivePerson. Great for people who want to ask a quick question for advice. Great for people who want to be in control of how long the session is. Great for people who want to be anonymous. For more information about Pay per minute, scroll down this page.

Please note: consulting with Roland is definitely for you if:

You wish to remain anonymous (LivePerson does not reveal the client's name, phone or email address to the counselors)

You wish pay as you go, so you can consult a little at a time or so you can test the waters and get started for a small amount. For example, at the current fee of $1.00 per minute, a 10 minute session is only $10.00. (fees are subject to change)

Pastoral counseling for a donation. Best value for people who want to chat several times or for multiple email exchanges. Click on the Counseling for a Donation Tab for more information.

Here are just a few of the issues I've been talking to people about for 21 years:

Do you have a marriage or relationship issue you would like
like some feedback on, guidance, or a second opinion from a professional Christian counselor? Would you like to talk to someone about the Christian walk, back sliding, substance issues, stress or unhappiness?

Why talk to anyone else when you can talk to a Senior Pastor. Many people have a marriage or relationship issue and would like to talk to a pastor, but they prefer to do so confidentially. They like their pastor but they don't want him to know. Other people are between churches, don't have a church, or just want to talk to a professional who is open to religion and spirituality.

"I'm a pastor." says Pastor Roland who has an earned MS and Doctorate in Pastoral Psychology. I am a spiritual care giver and I can also direct people to resources to get their questions answered.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program, books, articles, and private counsel for 22 years.

Many people want to talk to a priest or pastor. They have a spiritual issue they are dealing with or they need some feedback or counsel. They want to tell someone about something they want to get off their mind. They want to start moving forward. They want a person who is concerned, trustworthy, and sincere.

But they don't want to talk to just "someone" like some unknown counselor, prayer partner or faceless person. They don't want to talk to someone who is just getting started and doesn't have the wisdom and understanding of years. They want to talk to someone who has experience and who is mature. Someone solid and with some authority.

Others want to talk now and not next week. Some people are home bound. Some people want to get started now. They also like to be able to pick someone they are comfortable with.

It is for this reason that I am here.

If you would like prayer, click on the prayer request tab at the top of the page.

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues.

Get in touch with Roland for pastoral counseling or advice to get some feedback using our easy

Online Counseling for a Donation

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

I am available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and confidential. Chat in confidence, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 12 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

There are two options

Option One

For a modest donation you can chat (texting) with me. A suggested donation of $10.00 to $20.00 is what many people give.You can donate in advance to assure a prompt session with Roland. It can quickly be arranged by email exchange.

Option Two

For a donation get your question answered by email. Just donate below at Paypal and I will contact you by email within 24 hours about getting started right away. $10 is a suggested amount, but only what you can afford. Roland may recommend a bit more, but frequently is happy to help for a much smaller donation.

Just click here to donate
,

Thank you

Or you can just email Roland or talk to him at the chat link to inquire about getting started

Online Pastoral Counseling - Pay by the Minute, Leave When You Want

2012-02-12T15:44:00.000-08:00

Prefer Pay as You Go?

No problem. If you prefer pay as you go -- where you pay minute by minute and leave when you want. You are in charge of how long the session is. Visit my virtual office at LivePerson.

If you want to remain anonymous, where even the expert doesn't know who you are, then LivePerson is also for you.

Option Two

Prefer email? Send me an email, tell me you want relationship or marriage advice for a donation. Briefly state your issue and I will respond. (you must be 19, no emergencies).

Why are you waiting, get started today. Leave behind the baggage of the past and move forward to joy.

"Why talk to just anyone when you can talk me?" says Roland who has an earned MS and PhD in Pastoral Counseling.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program, books, articles, and private counseling for 22 years."

"This is the finest personal pastoral service on the web today."

__________________________________

Need some advice or feedback from a pastor? Need help with a relationship issue? Do you want some help coping with stress, family/work balance issues, overcoming negative emotions, or learning to forgive?

You must be 19. No emergencies, no crisis, and no abuse or violence issues.

It's a win-win. You get to contact Roland and get information. Then you can make a small donation if you are satisfied with the answer.

Just to make it clear.

We do not handle emergencies or crises.

We do not offer free counseling. We do offer free customer service:
you can ask about your issue and whether
pastoral counseling for a donation is right for you.

If pastoral counseling and advice is right for you, then you can tell Roland what donation you can afford. (Roland is supported solely by donations from visitors)

Most counselors and advisors ask for fees of $60 to over $100 per hour. How about mechanics, plumbers, electricians, and accountants? How about your beautician?

Roland makes his service available for a donation and he is open to sliding scale for people with tight budgets.

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

Roland is the author of 12 books, with 22 years experience. Roland has an earned MS and a Doctorate in Pastoral Counseling. He is board certified as a professional counselor.

Here are just a few of the issues I've been talking to people about for 22 years:

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in, solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues.

Relationship and marriage issues

Courtship, choosing the right partner

Help with marital unhappiness or infidelity issues

Feedback on depression, bipolar, OCD, and anxiety from a pastor's perspective

Help overcoming drug and alcohol issues

Overcoming emotional issues, such as unhappiness, upset, anger, or anxiety

Letting go of doubts and fears

People who don't want a record of their issue following them around.

Parenting issues, blended families, single parenting

Questions you would like to ask a pastor even though you are not involved in any religion.

How to cope with stress

Overcoming feelings of inferiority or insecurity.

Executives, clergy, actors, prominent people, entertainers, attorneys who want confidential counseling from a mentor and Senior Pastor.

Do you have a marriage or relationship issue you would like
like some feedback on, guidance, or a second opinion from a professional Christian counselor?

I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program for 22 years.

Many people want to talk to a someone. They have an issue they are dealing with or they need some feedback or counsel. They want to tell someone about something they want to get off their mind. They want to start moving forward. They want a person who is concerned, trustworthy, and sincere.

But they don't want to talk to just "someone" like some unknown counselor, prayer partner or faceless person. They don't want to talk to someone who is just getting started and doesn't have the wisdom and understanding of years. They want to talk to someone who has experience and who is mature. Someone solid and with some authority.

Others want to talk now and not next week. Some people are home bound. Some people want to get started now. They also like to be able to pick someone they are comfortable with.

It is for this reason that I am here.

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues. Sure, I'm a pastor, but I don't have a church. I do my own thing to help people.

Get in touch with Roland for pastoral counseling or advice to get some feedback using

Online Counseling for a Donation

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

I am available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and confidential. Chat in confidence, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 12 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

There are two options

Option One

For a donation you can chat (texting) with me. Or click on the LivePerson button for pay as you go, pay by the minute.

Option Two

For a donation you can have an email exchange. Just email Roland and tell him you want an answer by email for a donation.
Just click here to donate
,

Thank you

Roland is available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and ultra confidential. Chat in confidence, anonymity, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 12 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

We all need help sometimes or could use a little professional feedback. Maybe you want to talk to someone but don't want them to know who you are.

Right now you just want a little guidance on some issue with no strings attached

Perhaps you would just like some feedback from the convenience of home. That's what I'm here for.

Your friend,

Roland

Ask about a free eBook as a token of our appreciation when you chat and donate.

Spiritual Recovery - a New Book to Help with Mental Health and Emotional Issues

2012-02-11T17:52:00.000-08:00

The New York Times Religion Writer had an article about Rabbi Taub who is a popular mystical scholar and speaker about recovery for people with addictions. He is co-author of God of Our Understanding.

He says that our deepest problem is a dis-connect from God and the answer for true recovery is union with God.

Amen. I've been saying this for years. Finally someone else is saying it. Find God and all your issues will be on the mend. But it has to be real, and it has to be a personal knowing of God.

I have always said that you cannot study your way to God. Nor can you find him in external rituals. You find Him within when you begin to search with all your heart and when you let go of pride and become more forgiving toward others.

Mike's Story is not about addiction recovery from alcohol, gambling, or drugs. It is about recovery from depression, bipolar, anxiety, OCD, and other issues.

I have heard that Charlie C. was a beloved speaker and the book Another Pair of Glasses is a transcript of some of his speeches. It is a classic book on recovery from alcohol addiction. I have not had the privilege of reading it yet, though I would like to.

But I would like to humbly say that Mike's Story may one day become a classic in recovery from mental health issues, something like Charlie C.'s book is for alcohol recovery.

I helped put Mike's letters together and I wrote two chapters of my own
Ontological Insecurity and its Resolution
Repentance -God's Plan for Recovery

I hope you will have time to check it out.

New! Mike's Story is now a book. Preview the eBook. Read the whole inspiring story

Here is an letter written by someone who gets it. He overcame anxiety, depression and bipolar disorder. In this letter, he comments on the verse from the Psalms and then tells of his recovery journey. He gave me permission to share his letter but asked that I only use his first name, Michael. I hope someone will be inspired to give our free spiritual meditation a try. All I can say is "Thanks, Mike." Roland

Hello, my name is Michael.

I love this verse from the Psalms.

He is not afraid of bad news; his heart is firm, trusting in the Lord.
Psalm 112:7 (English Standard Version).

It sounds good, doesn't it? But the question is: how do you get to where you have such a firm heart and settled spirit?

It took me a long time to get to where I could understand and say something about having a firm heart and settled spirit. I was Mr. Jellyfish.

But here’s the good news: if I can do it, anyone can do it. It took me 40 years, but that was because it took 40 years for me to get to the point where I was ready. Once you’re ready, recovery can begin in a heartbeat.

And it doesn’t have to take 40 years to be ready. You can be ready in this instant regardless of your age, if your heart is pure and you are sincere.

Here's my story. Let's begin with a few thoughts about anxiety and some observations about life and how I started to recover.

When you are in a tight golf match and it's the 18th hole and you have to make a knee knocking three foot putt, what do you do? You suck it up, get a bucket full of guts, and even though your knees are knocking, you attempt the putt. . . . . .

Let's say you're a plumber and a client has a major break in a pipe under their house that has to be dealt with now. Do you become upset or angry and call a time out and make the client go to his room because you can't cope? No, you deal with the situation, even though you don't feel like it. . . . .

In plain and simple terms, some of us just haven't had a chance to build up some courage or chutzpa. We have been robbed of the kind of experiences where we could develop it.

Once you realize that you have been denied character building experiences (through being kept from them or from not being taught how to not over react), you can stop beating yourself up. Instead you can simply admit you don't have certain virtues built yet, but you can start to do some things anyway. By overlooking the fear or anxiety.

You will also discover that kindness, fortitude, endurance, graciousness, and patience are ready to unfold when you let go of resentment.

We tend to resent the type of circumstances where we looked bad or failed in the past. If you can learn to approach the new circumstance without resentment, then experience the anxiety (without resenting it), you will be then free to meet the moment with some aplomb. Now having met the moment properly, you will be able to meet the next one ever more easily and without resentment. Anxiety will diminish.

You will discover that there is joy and a sense of triumph in meeting a moment properly. Even if you don't "win" or handle it perfectly, there is joy in meeting it without resentment and with a certain amount of dignity. . . .

But as time went by (as years went by) I learned to fail less. And I also learned to react badly less to my failings. In other words, I began to grow up, and I'm still growing up.

When I was 10, 15, 20, 30 years old, did I have anxiety? Of course. Did I get depressed? Of course.

When my parents got divorced, it bothered me. When my dad died, it made me sad. When my parakeet died, I felt bad. What was I supposed to do, be happy about these things? I grieved and felt hurt and then I got over it.

When I was a little kid, did I go through a spell where I had to do a ritual of counting numbers or arrange my shoes perfectly at night or else "something really bad would happen?" Of course. Then I grew out of it.

When I was in college, was I high and hyper when something good happened and stayed up till dawn talking to my friends? Then did I crash when a bunch of things went wrong? Naturally.

When I was in my 20's did I wonder who I was and if there was a future for me? Did I mess up, and make mistakes? Sure.

And then did something try to tell me I was "worthless" and that "the world would be better off without me?" Of course.

When I was 30 and sitting in a lonely apartment in the outskirts of Chicago, with the snow coming down and nowhere to go and wishing I were back in California, did I feel depressed? Of course.

But here I am. I got through.

My recovery was two part. First it was just growing out of issues. It seems like each stage of our life--little kid, big kid, teenager, college age, 20's, 30's--there are some typical issues to deal with. The old expression "time heals all wounds" definitely applies. Somehow I just grew out of things.

This brings me to part two of my recovery program. I told you about part one, where I got through the various typical issues I faced at different stages. But then came the life changing, game changing discovery. I took me four decades to get to the point where I was ready. But when I was finally ready, it happened in a heartbeat and within a few days I was a new person.

I'll tell you about it in Part Two

Michael

___________________
.
Mike's Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs”

is now available in eBook to download to your computer, read online, or download to your mobile device right now!

Mike’s Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.” is the powerful personal testimony of someone
who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to
enjoy a successful, productive life.

Mike tells you about his childhood:

the traumas,
the obsessions
and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.
Mike tells you about his twenties: the
depression, the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk about how Zorro and Colombo helped him get through.

You’ll find out what the Zen Master said.

You’ll read about Mike’s close call with Dr. Rough Handling.

Mike loves to philosophize about life, love,

and he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals how he moved on and left the issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of meditation,
a change of heart,
and a hug and a kick in the pants from God.

Preview at Amazon.com now

Roland Trujillo, pastor, mentor and spiritual
director, is the author of 12 books. His popular self
help radio program has aired on both secular and
Christian radio stations around the country for 22
years.

“I love helping people improve their
relationships, overcome personal issues and find
their spiritual roots. People get stuck, and they need
someone who thinks outside the box to help
them look at life with fresh eyes.

People are resilient and can make progress in a very short amount of time.
Sometimes all it takes is an insight or two,
a little meditation to get centered, and knowing that there is someone
who has love, and who both understands
and can help. That’s all.

Preview eBook at Scribd.com

Preview at Amazon.com

Free Chat Sunday

2012-02-10T19:05:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite verses:
"This is the day which the Lord hath made. I will rejoice and be glad in it."

Hi, this is Pastor Roland. I love free chat because I get to communicate with friends from countries all over the world. Talk to a Pastor Online has friends in Nigeria, Ghana, Australia, India, Brazil and Jamaica - just to name a few.
Need prayer? Got a question you would like to ask a pastor? You have come to the right place.

Welcome to Chat with a Pastor

Chat with a Pastor is friendly, informative and educational.
If you would like to ask a pastor a question, you have come to the right place.
I have answered questions from friends around the world about a variety of topics. People ask me about tattoos, relationships, music, Bible questions, coping with stress, college, prayers, television, and much more. I'm always glad to help.

Before we begin, I just need to mention a few rules.
1. You must be 18.
2. No bedroom questions.
3. I cannot do counseling at free chat (but you can ask if pastoral counseling is right for you). Chat with a Pastor is for educational purposes only.
4. I cannot take questions if there is an emergency, violence, or abuse.

If you read and understood the rules and if your question is friendly and respectful, there is a good chance I will answer it.

So, if you are ready to get started, click on the link below (or on the picture of the keyboard in the right sidebar) Click To Chat

Prefer email? Send your question by email

Here's how it works. Click on the Click to Chat link.

Afterwards, if you appreciated his insights, then click on the coffee cup to buy Pastor Roland a virtual cup of coffee. This is totally voluntary and only if you want to after having gotten an answer

from Roland's insight, please
click on the coffee cup to buy him a $2 virtual cup of coffee.

Remember, your gift is only after a chat or email with Roland and only if you benefited from Roland's help. Only if you want to help Roland. Since Roland does not work for a church and does not get a salary, he needs a little bit to help him make ends meet. There is no rule about how much to give. Just what you feel comfortable with. Any gift is appreciated.

Christian Relationships Book for Only $2.00 Download Now

2012-02-10T09:07:00.000-08:00

Why do we argue? How can I be more forgiving?

Does divorce affect the kids?

Can I save my marriage?

This long awaited book answers these questions and more. For years, listeners have thrilled to hear Roland on the radio. Now his advice for couples is crystallized in this unique look at relationships.

Roland talks about the “how” of loving, forgiving, and reconciling. He will help you understand why resentment blocks love, and how to become unblocked. Roland even explains how the ancient story of Adam and Eve is still repeated in homes today. This book is for anyone interested in relationships, why relationships get in trouble, and how to repair them.

Formerly titled My Husband & I Argue All the Time--Time Tested Truths for Healing Relationships.

Whether you are a man or a woman in a relationship, whether you're having issues right now or trying to understand what went wrong, whether you aren't in a relationship now, but want to avoid the problems your parents had, this book is for you. Roland Trujillo is the author of 12 books.

Preview free and download now

Roland is now available for consultation and advice at http://commonsensecouples.blogspot.com

Verses and Words of Inspiration for Worry, Anxiety, and Lack of Faith

2012-02-07T18:52:00.002-08:00

And now, Lord, what wait I for? my hope is in Thee.

Psalm 39, verse 7.

O Lord, be gracious unto us; we have waited for Thee.
Isaiah 33, verse 2.

He never comes too late;
He knoweth what is best;
Vex not thyself in vain;
Until He cometh, rest.

B. T.

We make mistakes, or what we call such. The nature that could fall into such mistake exactly needs, and in the goodness of the dear God is given, the living of it out, and beyond this, I believe more.

That in the pure and patient living of it out we come to find that we have fallen, not into hopeless confusion of our own wild, ignorant making; but that the finger of God has been at work among our lines, and that the emerging is into His blessed order; that He is forever making up for us our own undoings; that He makes them up beforehand; that He evermore restoreth our souls.

A. D. T. Whitney.

THE Lord knows how to make stepping-stones for us of our defects, even; it is what He lets them be for.

He remembereth--He remembered in the making-- that we are but dust; the dust of earth, that He chose to make something little lower than the angels out of.
A. D. T. Whitney.

And now, Lord, what wait I for? my hope is in Thee.

Read a Free Relationships eBook Online

2012-02-07T14:43:00.003-08:00

I care so much about relationships that I am offering my 315 page relationships book, which sells for $14.95 on Amazon,

free to read online

as a February Valentine's Day Special.

Read the whole book online free
or look for the chapter that deals with your issue and read it for free.

Of course, I'm hoping you decide to purchase to download it to your laptop, computer or mobile device. (or get the handsome paperback edition at Amazon.

Take the resentment away
And make every day
A Love-ly Day!

I could use some comments at Amazon where the book is available in paperback and Kindle.

You can help me by reading the book free and then posting a short reviewing the book Amazon.

You don't have to buy the book at Amazon to leave a short review comment.

It doesn't have to be fancy. Just a sentence or two would be great.
__________________________________

Josh and Kaitlin just had another big argument. This time the huge spat was over the toothpaste tube.

Last week they had a big argument over money. Two weeks ago the argument was over whether to have the window open or closed.

Each time she throws everything in his face. He clams up. Nothing is solved. Another layer is added to unfinished business and baggage from the past, which resurfaces the next time they argue.

To the untrained observer, it would appear that the issue was the toothpaste tube, money or the window. But to Dr. Roland Trujillo PhD, not so.

"The toothpaste tube is only the occasion for pent up hostility, suppressed angers and long standing unfinished business to burst forth."

Roland continues: "Here's the rest of the story. Josh comes home from work and sits down in front of the television. Kaitlin had been working all day and taking care of the kids. She feels unappreciated.

Josh can sense that she is angry about something, but he doesn't want to begin a conversation because he knows the dam will break and she will throw a long list of things in his face. So he avoids talking.

Josh stays home in the evening even though his friends want him to play cards with them. He is angry because she does not appreciate his sacrifice. Kaitlin complains that the repair he made in the bathroom is not working so she is going to have to call someone else to do it who knows what they are doing. Josh feels like she does not respect him.

Kaitlin wants to talk. She hopes the maybe when thy go to bed, they can talk like they used to. Josh falls asleep right away. Kaitlin feels unloved.

Kaitlin admits to her friend that she tends to throw everything at him all at once. He probably feels overwhelmed says her friend. I know, says Kaitlin, but I can't help it. I keep trying to get his attention."

And once she does, everything that she has been holding in comes out. Afterwards she feels guilty about it.

Josh tells his friends that he loves his wife, but "she is never satisfied with anything I do." "I'm always wrong."

Soon one or both of them are thinking: "I'm tired of arguing. I'm tired of not being appreciated. I'm tired of being the one who has to work on our marriage. I'm tired of always giving in for peace. We have nothing in common. The love is gone."

Here's the bottom line, says Roland. Kaitlin is resentful. And so is Josh. It is the resentment that causes the accumulation of hurt feelings and hostility. The accumulation of upset leads to either exploding in anger or suppressing and clamming up. Neither is healthy.

Resentment washes away reason. Resentment takes away the ability to be reasonable and calm. It leads to frustration and upset. These lead to discouragement, feeling tired, negative thinking, stress and physical symptoms that stress contributes to.

I can help, says Roland. By learning to let go of resentment, you stop upset, frustration, bitterness, discouragement and all the other negative symptoms and feelings. It is also resentment that makes you feel empty.

Roland's practical solutions are based in understanding. "I describe the why of what is happening. I talk about men and women, about how they are different and about the common mistakes we make. Understanding is the answer. And when you become aware of what is really going on and see many good reasons for letting go of resentment, your new understanding will help you feel better and become more joyous and positive.

If your partner also develops understanding, then your relationship can become heaven on earth. If only you become more aware and mature in your understanding, you are still much better off because you will be able to deal gracefully with situations, and spare yourself the upset, frustration and emptiness you now feel.

Another thing, says Roland. Many people know they are resentful and want to give it up, but don't know how. I know how, and I show you.

Other people think that being more forgiving means giving in for peace. But I can show you that it is resentment and guilty that makes you keep quite or give in now. I can show you how to let go of resentment, which frees you up to express yourself and speak up (without resentment).

What I teach should be common knowledge, but you can hardly get these insights anywhere else. Sure there are some good marriage and relationship programs or counseling. The seminar leaders, writer or counselor may be working with bits and pieces of the solution. But I have the whole and I put it all together. With others, you get some pieces of the jigsaw puzzle, but I can give yo the complete picture.

New! The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage is now available in quality paperback at our Amazon.com eStore.

The price for this 315 page book is $14.50. A portion of all eStore sales is donated to help homeless pets at animal shelters. The rest helps Roland help others. Buy now.

For a donation of any amount, get The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage in pdf. format as a token of our appreciation.

Roland Trujillo, author, lecturer, marriage coach,
and author introduces his new comprehensive look at the delights, the challenges and the mysteries of marriage.

For over 20 years, Roland has been helping couples repair their relationships and move forward to optimal living.

Roland is now bringing his insights, based in compassion and spiritual principles, to a
new level in this unique look at the perils, pitfalls, and promises of relationships.

Why do we argue? How can I be more forgiving? Does divorce affect the kids? Can I save my marriage? My wife cheated on me-now what? My husband annoys me. Can we reconcile?

This long awaited book answers these questions and more. For years, listeners have thrilled to hear Roland on the radio. Now his advice for couples is crystallized in this unique look at relationships. Roland talks about the “how” of loving, forgiving, and reconciling. He will help you understand how resentment blocks love, and how to become unblocked.

Roland even explains how the ancient story of Adam and Eve is still repeated in homes today. This book is for anyone interested in relationships, why they get in trouble, and how to repair them

The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage - making relationships work.

318 pages of insights and solutions

Written by Dr. Roland Trujillo PhD in Pastoral Psychology and based on 20 years of counseling and coaching couples

Here are just some of the topics discussed

The Dating and Mating Game Is Not a Game
“A Rose by Any Other Name is Still a Rose”
Why I Decided to Become a Pastor
Where to Find Real Solutions to your Relationship Woes
Why Couples Argue
Myths of Marriage
Sex in Marriage – The Shocking Truth
How to Forgive and Forget
How to Apologize and Clear the Air with Dignity
Just How Important is Dad?
Marriage Counseling for Men
Can I Reconcile with My Husband, Wife, or Child?
Is Food Your Secret Lover and Enabler?
Dealing with Hard Times
Adam & Eve: The First Dysfunctional Family
My Husband is Annoying
My Wife Asked Me to Move Out –What Should I
Do?
Advice to Divorced Moms
My Wife Cheated on Me – Now What?
Finding the Best Marriage Advice – Trust Your Instincts
The Strong Family—Ten Lessons in Faithfulness

Purchase at Amazon.com in quality paperback for $14.95

Preview and purchase at Kindle! and download to your kindle or mobile device for $9.95

Preview at Scribd and purchase to download to your computer or mobile device for $9.95. Save 33% off paperback

Got a budget? Want to help Roland? For a donation of $5.00 we will send you this 315 page book in pdf. as a token of our appreciation. Click here to look inside or donate to help Roland

I Will Sing You a Song of That Beautiful Land - a Lovely Poem

2012-02-06T18:48:00.000-08:00

I will sing you a song of that beautiful land,
That far away home of the soul,
Where no storms ever beat on the glittering strand,
While the years of eternity roll.

O, that home of the soul! In my visions and dreams
Its bright jasper walls I can see,
Till I fancy but thinly the veil intervenes
Between the fair city and me.

That unchangeable home is for you and for me,
Where Jesus of Nazareth stands;
The King of all kingdoms forever is He,
And He holdeth our crowns in His hands.

O, how sweet it will be in that beautiful land,
So free from all sorrow and pain;
With songs on our lips and with harps in our hands,
To meet one another again!

Mrs. Ellen H. Gates

I am Not a Priest, But My Most Cherished Spiritual Writers and People of Moral Courage are Catholic

2012-02-04T19:26:00.000-08:00

Many people google my Talk to a Pastor site who are looking for a priest or pastor to talk to online. I always say right away that I am not a priest. I am a pastor. I make this very clear right away.

But I am also aware that Vatican II stated that it is permissible for a Catholic to get spiritual care from a non Catholic chaplain or pastor if the person is in need of spiritual care and there is no priest available. Being a chaplain, I understand that in the case of emergency where no priest is available, I am permitted to provide spiritual care to a Catholic. But I cannot absolve sins.

I am not seeking to minister to Catholics, but I am prepared to help if called upon to do so.
So I thought it might be nice to briefly recount my Catholic educational background and some of the Catholics who I hold in high esteem.

Down through history, some of our greatest spiritual writers, greatest saints, and deepest mystics have been and still are Catholic. This is remarkable, because the church has persecuted or at least given a hard time to some of them. I also know that Catholics seem to understand me and some love my radio program.

It must be said that I have a great love for and affinity for the Catholic Church. Possibly the fact that I went to parochial High School for 4 years (Oblates of St. Francis de Salles), and attended a major Catholic University for 6 years (BA and MS) has has something to do with my affinity for Catholics.

Or could it be that everyone on my dad's side of the family are Catholic.

Perhaps. But it goes deeper than that. Cardinal Fenelon, Madam Jeanne Guyon, and Michael de Molinos, all very spiritual writers and mystics (and given a hard time by the church they loved and were loyal to) are some of my favorite writers.

I love Madame Guyon, and I understand her too. She sought to help people find union with God within. And her Finding God through Prayer (Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ) or in French "a short and easy method of prayer," is a classic in spiritual literature. It is beloved by many Protestants and I first heard about her and her wonderful book on the radio from Chaplain Ray and his prison ministry.

I don't know why but I also loved Fr. Malachi Martin (the exorcist) and well published popular writer. I heard him interviewed by Art Bell and I think his book on exorcism and possession (Hostage to the Devil) is the best there is.

I love Cardinal Von Galen who spoke out, with great risk to himself, against Nazi killing of the mentally disabled.

I love the Catholic Church because it continues to stand, with those of goodwill of every race and religion, for the dignity of life, the rights and safety of the unborn, and for the downtrodden of the world.

As I write this, I am reading Living the Catholic Faith - Rediscovering the Basics, by Charles Chaput who is now the Archbishop of Philadelphia. It is a nice book and recommended.
He has an excellent article online which is speech he gave recently at a university.
Being Human in an Age of Unbelief
by Charles J. Chaput
November 8, 2011
Four points in defense of human dignity. Adapted from an address delivered last night at the University of Pennsylvania.

Here are some excerpts from his address:

Last year I had the good fortune to read Eric Metaxas’s wonderful book, Bonhoeffer. It’s a biography of the great Lutheran theologian, Dietrich Bonhoeffer. I’ve quoted Bonhoeffer’s work many times over the years. The reason is simple. I admire him. He could have been a professor. Instead he chose to be a pastor. He could have had a sterling academic career of lecturing about his ideas and his faith. Instead he chose to put them into action and to immerse himself in people’s lives. He was a man not of “values” in the meager modern sense, but of virtues in the classical and religious sense—the virtues of justice, courage, and love, all grounded in the deep virtue of faith in a loving God.

The Third Reich hanged Bonhoeffer for his resistance activities just a few weeks before the end of the Second World War. Today we see him—rightly—as one of the great moral witnesses of the last century; a man who fought for the good, in the face of very grave evil, at the cost of his life.

Another great moral witness of the twentieth century was the writer Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, who began as an atheist but ended Russian Orthodox. His history of The Gulag Archipelago, in its indictment of Marx, Lenin, Stalin and the brutality of Soviet repression that grew naturally from their thought, is a masterpiece of modern literature. Like Bonhoeffer, Solzhenitsyn wrote from direct experience of imprisonment and organized inhumanity. Unlike Bonhoeffer, Solzhenitsyn survived the war, survived years in prison camps, and was eventually exiled to the West.

In 1978, four years after Solzhenitsyn left Russia, Harvard University asked him to speak to its graduating students. What Harvard may have expected was praise for Western abundance, freedom, and diversity. What it got was very different.

Solzhenitsyn began by noting that Harvard’s motto is Veritas. This is the Latin word for “truth.” Then he added that “truth is seldom pleasant; it is almost invariably bitter.”

Then he spent the next 6,000 words saying what nobody wanted to hear. He methodically criticized Western cowardice and self-indulgence; the vanity and weakness of America’s intellectual classes; the “tilt of freedom in the direction of evil;” the right of people “not to have their divine souls stuffed with gossip, nonsense [and] vain talk” by the mass media; a pervasive Western atmosphere of legalism and moral mediocrity; and the rise of a destructive individualism that now forces decent people “to defend not so much human rights as human obligations.”

Some of Solzhenitsyn’s hard words came from his suffering. Some flowed from loneliness for his own country. But while Solzhenitsyn was harsh in his comments at Harvard, he also was accurate in at least some of what he said. Speaking of his Russian homeland he said, “After suffering decades of violence and oppression, the human soul longs for things higher, warmer and purer” than anything offered by the practical atheism now common in the West.

The reason for the problems of the West, said Solzhenitsyn, is found “at the root, at the very basis of human thinking in the past [several] centuries.” Our culture has fallen away from our own biblically informed heritage. We’ve lost the foundation for our moral vocabulary. This loss has starved our spirit, debased our sense of any higher purpose to life, and destroyed our ability to defend or even to explain any special dignity we assigned to the human person in the past.

end of excerpts

I agree with this and I hope you have time to read his full address. It is inspiring.

Thank you Archbishop Chaput.

I am a pastor and I am nondenominational. I choose to be independent. My books, my mindfulness meditation, and my radio program will be of interest and value to true seekers regardless of their background. With humility, I am your servant and friend.

Pastor Roland

Christian Dating Advice Online - Pastor Roland 22 Years on the Radio and 12 Books

2012-02-04T15:30:00.002-08:00

I'm now available by telephone!

Click here and visit my virtual office.

When you are are there,
just click on the phone button

If I'm helping someone else or away from my desk, just click on the email button and tell me you want to talk by phone and when. I'll email you back and then wait for your call.

Prefer texting?
The first three minutes are free!

Just go to my Liveperson Virtual Office

and click on the chat button

You'll be chatting with me right away.

(You must be 18. No emergencies, crises, abuse or violence issues)

Free Christian Counseling eBook on Relationships by a Senior Pastor

2012-02-03T16:51:00.000-08:00

I care so much about relationships that I am offering my 315 page relationships book, which sells for $14.95 on Amazon,

free to read online

as a February Valentine's Day Special.

Read the whole book online or look for the chapter that deals with your issue and read it for free.

Of course, I'm hoping you decide to download it to your laptop, computer or mobile device.

Take the resentment away
And make every day
A Love-ly Day!

I could use some comments at Amazon where the book is available in paperback and Kindle.

You can help me by reading the book free and then posting a short reviewing the book Amazon.

You don't have to buy the book at Amazon to leave a short review comment.

It doesn't have to be fancy. Just a sentence or two would be great.
__________________________________

Josh and Kaitlin just had another big argument. This time the huge spat was over the toothpaste tube.

Last week they had a big argument over money. Two weeks ago the argument was over whether to have the window open or closed.

Each time she throws everything in his face. He clams up. Nothing is solved. Another layer is added to unfinished business and baggage from the past, which resurfaces the next time they argue.

To the untrained observer, it would appear that the issue was the toothpaste tube, money or the window. But to Dr. Roland Trujillo PhD, not so.

"The toothpaste tube is only the occasion for pent up hostility, suppressed angers and long standing unfinished business to burst forth."

Roland continues: "Here's the rest of the story. Josh comes home from work and sits down in front of the television. Kaitlin had been working all day and taking care of the kids. She feels unappreciated.

Josh can sense that she is angry about something, but he doesn't want to begin a conversation because he knows the dam will break and she will throw a long list of things in his face. So he avoids talking.

Josh stays home in the evening even though his friends want him to play cards with them. He is angry because she does not appreciate his sacrifice. Kaitlin complains that the repair he made in the bathroom is not working so she is going to have to call someone else to do it who knows what they are doing. Josh feels like she does not respect him.

Kaitlin wants to talk. She hopes the maybe when thy go to bed, they can talk like they used to. Josh falls asleep right away. Kaitlin feels unloved.

Kaitlin admits to her friend that she tends to throw everything at him all at once. He probably feels overwhelmed says her friend. I know, says Kaitlin, but I can't help it. I keep trying to get his attention."

And once she does, everything that she has been holding in comes out. Afterwards she feels guilty about it.

Josh tells his friends that he loves his wife, but "she is never satisfied with anything I do." "I'm always wrong."

Soon one or both of them are thinking: "I'm tired of arguing. I'm tired of not being appreciated. I'm tired of being the one who has to work on our marriage. I'm tired of always giving in for peace. We have nothing in common. The love is gone."

Here's the bottom line, says Roland. Kaitlin is resentful. And so is Josh. It is the resentment that causes the accumulation of hurt feelings and hostility. The accumulation of upset leads to either exploding in anger or suppressing and clamming up. Neither is healthy.

Resentment washes away reason. Resentment takes away the ability to be reasonable and calm. It leads to frustration and upset. These lead to discouragement, feeling tired, negative thinking, stress and physical symptoms that stress contributes to.

I can help, says Roland. By learning to let go of resentment, you stop upset, frustration, bitterness, discouragement and all the other negative symptoms and feelings. It is also resentment that makes you feel empty.

Roland's practical solutions are based in understanding. "I describe the why of what is happening. I talk about men and women, about how they are different and about the common mistakes we make. Understanding is the answer. And when you become aware of what is really going on and see many good reasons for letting go of resentment, your new understanding will help you feel better and become more joyous and positive.

If your partner also develops understanding, then your relationship can become heaven on earth. If only you become more aware and mature in your understanding, you are still much better off because you will be able to deal gracefully with situations, and spare yourself the upset, frustration and emptiness you now feel.

Another thing, says Roland. Many people know they are resentful and want to give it up, but don't know how. I know how, and I show you.

Other people think that being more forgiving means giving in for peace. But I can show you that it is resentment and guilty that makes you keep quite or give in now. I can show you how to let go of resentment, which frees you up to express yourself and speak up (without resentment).

What I teach should be common knowledge, but you can hardly get these insights anywhere else. Sure there are some good marriage and relationship programs or counseling. The seminar leaders, writer or counselor may be working with bits and pieces of the solution. But I have the whole and I put it all together. With others, you get some pieces of the jigsaw puzzle, but I can give yo the complete picture.

New! The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage is now available in quality paperback at our Amazon.com eStore.

The price for this 315 page book is $14.50. A portion of all eStore sales is donated to help homeless pets at animal shelters. The rest helps Roland help others. Buy now.

For a donation of any amount, get The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage in pdf. format as a token of our appreciation.

Roland Trujillo, author, lecturer, marriage coach,
and author introduces his new comprehensive look at the delights, the challenges and the mysteries of marriage.

For over 20 years, Roland has been helping couples repair their relationships and move forward to optimal living.

Roland is now bringing his insights, based in compassion and spiritual principles, to a
new level in this unique look at the perils, pitfalls, and promises of relationships.

Why do we argue? How can I be more forgiving? Does divorce affect the kids? Can I save my marriage? My wife cheated on me-now what? My husband annoys me. Can we reconcile?

This long awaited book answers these questions and more. For years, listeners have thrilled to hear Roland on the radio. Now his advice for couples is crystallized in this unique look at relationships. Roland talks about the “how” of loving, forgiving, and reconciling. He will help you understand how resentment blocks love, and how to become unblocked.

Roland even explains how the ancient story of Adam and Eve is still repeated in homes today. This book is for anyone interested in relationships, why they get in trouble, and how to repair them

The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage - making relationships work.

318 pages of insights and solutions

Written by Dr. Roland Trujillo PhD in Pastoral Psychology and based on 20 years of counseling and coaching couples

Here are just some of the topics discussed

The Dating and Mating Game Is Not a Game
“A Rose by Any Other Name is Still a Rose”
Why I Decided to Become a Pastor
Where to Find Real Solutions to your Relationship Woes
Why Couples Argue
Myths of Marriage
Sex in Marriage – The Shocking Truth
How to Forgive and Forget
How to Apologize and Clear the Air with Dignity
Just How Important is Dad?
Marriage Counseling for Men
Can I Reconcile with My Husband, Wife, or Child?
Is Food Your Secret Lover and Enabler?
Dealing with Hard Times
Adam & Eve: The First Dysfunctional Family
My Husband is Annoying
My Wife Asked Me to Move Out –What Should I
Do?
Advice to Divorced Moms
My Wife Cheated on Me – Now What?
Finding the Best Marriage Advice – Trust Your Instincts
The Strong Family—Ten Lessons in Faithfulness

Purchase at Amazon.com in quality paperback for $14.95

Preview and purchase at Kindle! and download to your kindle or mobile device for $9.95

Preview at Scribd and purchase to download to your computer or mobile device for $9.95. Save 33% off paperback

Got a budget? Want to help Roland? For a donation of $5.00 we will send you this 315 page book in pdf. as a token of our appreciation. Click here to look inside or donate to help Roland

Is It Wrong to Smoke Weed for a Christian? Ask Dear Pastor and Get An Answer

2012-02-01T09:08:00.000-08:00

Dear Pastor,

Is it wrong to smoke weed?

Have you heard of Pastor Roland's
"Yes, but . . . . . .
or
No, but . . . .
answers?

Here's the story.

"Hi, this is Pastor Roland. I've had a radio advice program for 22 years and I passed the million listener mark long ago.

My Talk to a Pastor Radio Program airs on KCAA Radio 1050 AM in Riverside, CA.
Now I'm also on the internet asking questions.

It's called Dear Pastor. In fact I've got DearPastor.tk so you can remember the web address.
I answer questions from all over the world.

People want a good answer to their question. A good answer is direct and to the point, but it also has an explanation.

People often ask me "Is it wrong to . . . . .?

I want to answer, but if I just say "Yes" or just say "No," it's not enough.

But people do want to know the answer.

A good answer includes a thoughtful explanation.

Which takes a lot of time and thought.

Like writing a good essay for a college class.

I have thought about it long and hard. I want to give people a good answer.

So here is what I have decided on. I hope you like it.

I will answer the question directly "Yes but"

or "No but."

For free you get the yes but or no but.

If you want the explanation (which I'm sure you will) -
just donate $2 and I will email the rest of the story.

Every 4th person will also get a link to read an ebook online for free.

It's a win-win.
You get a direct answer
an explanation
and I get a cup of coffee

Blessings,
Pastor Roland

Is It Wrong to Get a Tattoo? Ask Dear Pastor to get an answer

2012-02-01T08:47:00.000-08:00

Dear Pastor,

Is it wrong to get a tattoo?

Have you heard of Pastor Roland's
"Yes, but . . . . . .
or
No, but . . . .
answers?

Here's the story.

"Hi, this is Pastor Roland. I've had a radio advice program for 22 years and I passed the million listener mark long ago.

My Talk to a Pastor Radio Program airs on KCAA Radio 1050 AM in Riverside, CA.
Now I'm also on the internet asking questions.

It's called Dear Pastor. In fact I've got DearPastor.tk so you can remember the web address.
I answer questions from all over the world.

People want a good answer to their question. A good answer is direct and to the point, but it also has an explanation.

People often ask me "Is it wrong to . . . . .?

I want to answer, but if I just say "Yes" or just say "No," it's not enough.

But people do want to know the answer.

A good answer includes a thoughtful explanation.

Which takes a lot of time and thought.

Like writing a good essay for a college class.

I have thought about it long and hard. I want to give people a good answer.

So here is what I have decided on. I hope you like it.

I will answer the question directly "Yes but"

or "No but."

For free you get the yes but or no but.

If you want the explanation (which I'm sure you will) -
just donate $2 and I will email the rest of the story.

Every 4th person will also get a link to read an ebook online for free.

It's a win-win.
You get a direct answer
an explanation
and I get a cup of coffee

Blessings,
Pastor Roland

The Best Little Book on Stress

2012-01-31T16:37:00.000-08:00

Conquering Stress and Its Symptoms
by Roland Trujillo
$10.95
Qty:
Availability: In Stock.
Product Number: 030-437881966
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Genre: Advice & Self-Help
Paperback: 60 pages

Description: This book looks at the nature of stress and provides some positive steps we may take to cope with life without the dysfunctional aspects of excessive stress.

Synopsis:

Do you become upset at your kids? Do you resent your mate? Do you become irritable or tense? Learning to manage stress is a very important skill. This book looks at the nature of stress and provides some positive steps we may take to cope with life without the dysfunctional aspects of excessive stress. The author looks at stress from both a psycho-emotional and a metaphysical perspective. Preview free online at http://www.commonsensecounseling.org/ebook_offer.htm

Product Details:

· Paperback: 60 pages
· Binding: Perfect

available in paperback at Cafe Press

Christian Author and Million Listener Radio Advisor New Book

2012-01-31T09:32:00.000-08:00

Roland Trujillo's new book

A Hug and a Kick in the Pants from God

will be published soon. Watch for it.

A Hug and a Kick in the Pants
by Roland Trujillo
copyright 2012 by Roland Trujillo

A Success Story Every Back Slider, Worldy Christian and Christian with Issues Will Want to Read

2012-01-31T09:25:00.000-08:00

This true story is The Confession of St. Augustine for today's therapeutic society. If you liked Unbroken or Luis Zamperini's Devil at My Heels, you will want to read the inspiring story of a guy who overcame mental health and emotional issues. Mike is the 21st Century's Everyman. And he's got a sense of humor too.

Mike's Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs”

is now available

Mike’s Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.” is the powerful personal testimony of someone who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to enjoy a successful, productive life.

Mike tells you about his childhood:

the traumas,
the obsessions
and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.
Mike tells you about his twenties: the
depression, the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk about how Zorro and Colombo helped him get through.

You’ll find out what the Zen Master said.

You’ll read about Mike’s close call with Dr. Rough Handling.

Mike loves to philosophize about life, love,

and he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals how he moved on and left the issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of meditation,
a change of heart,
and a hug and a kick in the pants from God.

Table of Contents

Introduction 15
How to Find Confidence 23
How I Overcame Childhood Issues and Became a Regular Guy 41
What Helped Me Get Through My 20’s and 30’s 48
Mike Philosophizes on Life and Recovery 54
How I Overcame Anxiety and Other Issues 61
Why So Many of Us Today Lack Self Confidence 78
Repentance: God’s Plan for Recovery 89
Mike Overcomes Social Phobia and Discovers the Christian Walk 99
How I Overcame Emotional Abuse and Trauma 112
Mike’s Thoughts on Rest for the Body, Relaxation for the Mind and Peace for the Soul 122
How I Overcame Childhood Trauma 130
Mike Describes His Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Symptoms
and How He Overcame Them 136
Do I Have a Future? Does Anyone Care? Yes, Says Mike 151
How I Overcame ADHD – My True Story 159
Mike Writes a Poem of Repentance, Recovery, Triumph and Redemption 165
Two special chapters written by Roland Trujillo:
Ontological Insecurity And Its Resolution 179
Recovery God’s Way 195
Postscript 212

Roland Trujillo, pastor, mentor and spiritual
director, is the author of 12 books. His popular self
help radio program has aired on both secular and
Christian radio stations around the country for 22
years.

“I love helping people improve their
relationships, overcome personal issues and find
their spiritual roots. People get stuck, and they need
someone who thinks outside the box to help
them look at life with fresh eyes.

People are resilient and can make progress in a very short amount of time.
Sometimes all it takes is an insight or two,
a little meditation to get centered, and knowing that there is someone
who has love, and who both understands
and can help. That’s all.

I have discovered that the secret to life is in overlooking.

You have anxiety, but overlook it. In other words, instead of struggling with, suppressing or trying to get rid of the anxiety, you overlook it.

Someone makes a mistake, but you overlook it (instead of judging or resenting them). You have doubts, but you overlook them (instead of dwelling on them).

You feel anger (at your child, for example), but you overlook it (and remain calm).

Remember it took 80 years for Moses to be made ready to lead his people out of Egypt.

And by exercising virtue, it will grow, and you will increase in composure and self control. No, you won't walk on water--but by exercising virtue, you'll begin to face things with at least a modicum of natural poise, and it will grow.

Therefore do not mind it if you encounter some difficulty.

So you'll have to start now where you are at. And it doesn't matter where that is.

So start to face some things today. And like I said, don't expect to get it just right from the start. Take it easy. Rome wasn't built in a day. Don't look for perfection. Look for progress. And here's a word of caution: start with the small stuff. . . .

When I was 10, 15, 20, 30 years old, did I have anxiety? Of course. Did I get depressed? Of course.

When my parents got divorced, it bothered me. When my dad died, it made me sad. When my parakeet died, I felt bad. What was I supposed to do, be happy about these things? I grieved and felt hurt and then I got over it.

When I was a little kid, did I go through a spell where I had to do a ritual of counting numbers or arrange my shoes perfectly at night or else "something really bad would happen?" Of course. Then I grew out of it.

When I was in college, was I high and hyper when something good happened and stayed up till dawn talking to my friends? Then did I crash when a bunch of things went wrong? Naturally.

When I was in my 20's did I wonder who I was and if there was a future for me? Did I mess up, and make mistakes? Sure.

But here I am. I got through.

My recovery was two part. First it was just growing out of issues. Secondly, it was a spiritual awakening when I was 40 years old.

So we grow, we mature, we leave behind the things of childhood--including issues. We move on. It's a long process and it's life.

It's a relief to find out that lots of people have the same issues, and lots of people get better.

I'm extending my hand in friendship to talk about some of the things I have been blessed to learn along the way in my spiritual walk.

Your friend, Mike

______________________

Read about how Mike had all the symptoms of ADHD and what, thank God, his parents did and did not do.

Mike tells about his depression around age 30, and how listening to the radio helped him overcome it.

Mike talks about meditation and how it has helped him.

Find out how Mike is doing now.

And much more.

____________________________
.

Mike's Story is now available in both eBook and quality paperback

Special Offer:

For a donation of $10, we will send you a pdf eBook of Mike's Story by email.

Your gift helps Roland help others. And you will benefit from this ground breaking new self help book.

If you would like the quality paperback edition from Amazon
click here

Pastor Roland Launches Dear Pastor - finally a Dear Abby type Advisor for Christians

2012-01-31T09:17:00.000-08:00

Tired of talking to a faceless web page?
Would you like an answer from a real person?

Pastor Roland, with over a million listeners to his radio advice program now in its 22nd year, is launching his online service.

If you have a question, why settle for the rest when you can have the best?

We're changing and growing rapidly. Check back often. Or ask your question now!

Success Story of Someone Who Overcame Obstacles and Issues - The Inspiring True Story of Mike

2012-01-31T09:11:00.000-08:00

Mike's Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs”

is now available in eBook to download to your computer, read online, or download to your mobile device right now!

Mike’s Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.” is the powerful personal testimony of someone who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to enjoy a successful, productive life.

Mike tells you about his childhood:

the traumas,
the obsessions
and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.
Mike tells you about his twenties: the
depression, the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk about how Zorro and Colombo helped him get through.

You’ll find out what the Zen Master said.

You’ll read about Mike’s close call with Dr. Rough Handling.

Mike loves to philosophize about life, love,

and he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals how he moved on and left the issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of meditation,
a change of heart,
and a hug and a kick in the pants from God.

Table of Contents

Introduction 15
How to Find Confidence 23
How I Overcame Childhood Issues and Became a Regular Guy 41
What Helped Me Get Through My 20’s and 30’s 48
Mike Philosophizes on Life and Recovery 54
How I Overcame Anxiety and Other Issues 61
Why So Many of Us Today Lack Self Confidence 78
Repentance: God’s Plan for Recovery 89
Mike Overcomes Social Phobia and Discovers the Christian Walk 99
How I Overcame Emotional Abuse and Trauma 112
Mike’s Thoughts on Rest for the Body, Relaxation for the Mind and Peace for the Soul 122
How I Overcame Childhood Trauma 130
Mike Describes His Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Symptoms
and How He Overcame Them 136
Do I Have a Future? Does Anyone Care? Yes, Says Mike 151
How I Overcame ADHD – My True Story 159
Mike Writes a Poem of Repentance, Recovery, Triumph and Redemption 165
Two special chapters written by Roland Trujillo:
Ontological Insecurity And Its Resolution 179
Recovery God’s Way 195
Postscript 212

Preview now

Roland Trujillo, pastor, mentor and spiritual
director, is the author of 12 books. His popular self
help radio program has aired on both secular and
Christian radio stations around the country for 22
years.

“I love helping people improve their
relationships, overcome personal issues and find
their spiritual roots. People get stuck, and they need
someone who thinks outside the box to help
them look at life with fresh eyes.

People are resilient and can make progress in a very short amount of time.
Sometimes all it takes is an insight or two,
a little meditation to get centered, and knowing that there is someone
who has love, and who both understands
and can help. That’s all.

Read excerpts from Chapter One

Here is an letter written by someone who gets it. He overcame anxiety, depression and bipolar disorder. In this letter, he comments on the verse from the Psalms and then tells of his recovery journey. He gave me permission to share his letter but asked that I only use his first name, Michael. I hope someone will be inspired to give our free spiritual meditation a try. All I can say is "Thanks, Mike." Roland

Hello, my name is Michael.

I love this verse from the Psalms.

He is not afraid of bad news; his heart is firm, trusting in the Lord.
Psalm 112:7 (English Standard Version).

It sounds good, doesn't it? But the question is: how do you get to where you have such a firm heart and settled spirit?

It took me a long time to get to where I could understand and say something about having a firm heart and settled spirit. I was Mr. Jellyfish.

But here’s the good news: if I can do it, anyone can do it. It took me 40 years, but that was because it took 40 years for me to get to the point where I was ready. Once you’re ready, recovery can begin in a heartbeat.

And it doesn’t have to take 40 years to be ready. You can be ready in this instant regardless of your age, if your heart is pure and you are sincere.

Here's my story. Let's begin with a few thoughts about anxiety and some observations about life and how I started to recover. . . . .

When you are in a tight golf match and it's the 18th hole and you have to make a knee knocking three foot putt, what do you do? You suck it up, get a bucket full of guts, and even though your knees are knocking, you attempt the putt.

Let's say you're a plumber and a client has a major break in a pipe under their house that has to be dealt with now. Do you become upset or angry and call a time out and make the client go to his room because you can't cope? No, you deal with the situation, even though you don't feel like it. . . . . .

I have discovered that the secret to life is in overlooking.

You have anxiety, but overlook it. In other words, instead of struggling with, suppressing or trying to get rid of the anxiety, you overlook it.

Remember it took 80 years for Moses to be made ready to lead his people out of Egypt.

So you might as well be prepared for a long period of just being a regular person. But you can start to get ready for the touch of God which may come someday by living with some dignity, some honor, some self control, some discipline where you are right now.

And by exercising virtue, it will grow, and you will increase in composure and self control. No, you won't walk on water--but by exercising virtue, you'll begin to face things with at least a modicum of natural poise, and it will grow.

Therefore do not mind it if you encounter some difficulty. Do not become resentful if you have some ups and downs, some rain on your parade, a boyfriend or girlfriend who quits you, a job you don't get, a day when you don't feel particularly good or some anxiety if you have to give a speech. . . .

So you'll have to start now where you are at. And it doesn't matter where that is.

So start to face some things today. And like I said, don't expect to get it just right from the start. Take it easy. Rome wasn't built in a day. Don't look for perfection. Look for progress. And here's a word of caution: start with the small stuff. . . .

Remember how I said that we have been made self conscious in many ways? Okay. So don't hate yourself if you meet a moment badly. . . . .

When I was 10, 15, 20, 30 years old, did I have anxiety? Of course. Did I get depressed? Of course.

When my parents got divorced, it bothered me. When my dad died, it made me sad. When my parakeet died, I felt bad. What was I supposed to do, be happy about these things? I grieved and felt hurt and then I got over it.

When I was a little kid, did I go through a spell where I had to do a ritual of counting numbers or arrange my shoes perfectly at night or else "something really bad would happen?" Of course. Then I grew out of it.

When I was in college, was I high and hyper when something good happened and stayed up till dawn talking to my friends? Then did I crash when a bunch of things went wrong? Naturally.

When I was in my 20's did I wonder who I was and if there was a future for me? Did I mess up, and make mistakes? Sure.

And then did something try to tell me I was "worthless" and that "the world would be better off without me?" Of course.

When I was 30 and sitting in a lonely apartment in the outskirts of Chicago, with the snow coming down and nowhere to go and wishing I were back in California, did I feel depressed? Of course.

But here I am. I got through.

My recovery was two part. First it was just growing out of issues. Secondly, it was a spiritual awakening when I was 40 years old.

It seems like each stage of our life--little kid, big kid, teenager, college age, 20's, 30's--there are some typical issues to deal with. The old expression "time heals all wounds" definitely applies. Somehow I just grew out of things.

Like when I was a kid, teen, and in my 20's I was painfully shy. But then when I was in my 30's I was teaching college classes, and now I feel comfortable around everyone and talk about anything.

Okay, so it took a few years to get over it. But I did get over it.

So we grow, we mature, we leave behind the things of childhood--including issues. We move on. It's a long process and it's life.

It's a relief to find out that lots of people have the same issues, and lots of people get better.

I'm extending my hand in friendship to talk about some of the things I have been blessed to learn along the way in my spiritual walk.

Your friend, Mike

Roland's comments

"Thanks, Mike
Your letter is inspirational.

I believe that it is hard to be a good person or a good Christian and express truth and love when you are resentful, upset, angry, and lost in the imagination. We are much better off dealing with our loved ones and life's situations with patience and reason instead of upset.

That is why I enjoy helping people calm down first. After finding the secret to self control, they will then be able to express love, reason and patience.".

Read about how Mike had all the symptoms of ADHD and what, thank God, his parents did and did not do.

Mike tells about his depression around age 30, and how listening to the radio helped him overcome it.

Mike talks about meditation and how it has helped him.

Find out how Mike is doing now.

And much more.

____________________________
.

You've Got Questions and Like Yahoo Answers? Now There is Ask a Pastor

2012-01-31T08:35:00.000-08:00

Tired of asking some anonymous person? Tired of asking a faceless web page?

Wish Dear Abby were still there or Ann Landers? Now there is Dear Pastor. He's been answering question on the radio for 22 years and over a million people have listened to his answers. Now he is on the internet too.

The Ask a Pastor Poem
by Michael Carlos Simon

Email answer from a pastor?
Is chat with a pastor faster?
Ask Pastor Roland
And he will give you an answer.

Can you ask an email question too?
Of course, Pastor Ro is there for you.

From Copenhagen to Key Largo,
From New York to Chicago,
Over in Ghana,
and South of Lackawana,
Ask Pastor Ro.

"My boyfriend wants to live together.
Do pastors always say "Never?"
Ask Pastor Roland.

"What about Christian rock and tattoos?
In church, is it wrong to snooze?"
Bible Question? Pastor says yes.
Find out for sure,
you don't have to guess.

"What's the purpose of life?
Why is there so much strife?
What is the meaning of life?"
I don't know,
I'll ask Pastor Ro.

Got a question about religion?
Told a lie or cheated a smidgeon?
Got relationship issues?
Quit crying in your tissues.
Just ask Pastor Roland.

If you're dealing with a lot of stress?
And your apartment is a mess,
Don't hesitate,
There's no need to wait.
Ask Pastor Roland how to meditate.

"Should I tell my kids about Santa Claus?
Was Jesus the greatest man who ever was?
When my cat died, where did she go?"
Does anyone really know?
I'll ask Pastor Ro.

"I'm taking drugs, but I really want hugs.
When I ask questions, everyone shrugs."
Who will answer questions for me?
Pastor Roland is there for thee.

"But I don't have much money today
I can only afford a frappuccino
or a small bottle of vino.
Maybe a 99 cent download tune
And I need a bottle of shampoo."

"What can I do
If I can only afford a dollar or two?"

No problem.
Pastor Ro is there for you.

He is really nice
to those who can't afford a higher price
Buy Pastor a 2 dollar cup of coffee
He'll answer your question happily.

You've got to be kidding?
No, it's absolutely true.
Pastor Ro is there for you

For a two dollar donation
He'll answer your question
Without hesitation.

Of course, it's not counseling or therapy
It's for fun and education
And common sense practicality.
Like writing to Dear Abby

So get your question ready.
Hold your Ipad steady.
Click on the keyboard image,
And don't forget to eat your spinach.

He's got you covered in San Francisco,
Kansas and Texas,
Hello Frisco.
Rio, Toronto and Timbuktu,
Pastor Roland has answers for you,
And maybe a blessing too.

Ask a Pastor Get an Answer for a $2 Donation

2012-01-30T17:54:00.000-08:00

The Talk to a Pastor Poem
by Michael Carlos Simon

Chat with a pastor?
Ask Pastor Roland a question
And he will give you an answer.

Can you ask an email question too?
Of course, Pastor Ro is there for you.

From Copenhagen to Key Largo,
From New York to Chicago,
Over in Ghana,
and South of Lackawana,
Ask Pastor Ro.

My boyfriend wants to live together.
Do pastors always say "Never?"
Ask Pastor Roland.

What about Christian rock and tattoos?
In church, is it wrong to snooze?
Bible Question? Pastor says yes.
Find out for sure,
you don't have to guess.

What's the purpose of life?
Why is there so much strife?
What is the meaning of life?
I don't know,
I'll ask Pastor Ro.

Got a question about religion?
Told a lie or cheated a smidgeon?
Got relationship issues?
Quit crying in your tissues.
Just ask Pastor Roland.

If you're dealing with a lot of stress?
And your apartment is a mess,
Don't hesitate,
There's no need to wait.
Ask Pastor Roland how to meditate.

Should I tell my kids about Santa Claus?
Was Jesus the greatest man who ever was?
When my cat died, where did she go?
Does anyone really know?
I'll ask Pastor Ro.

I'm taking drugs, but I really want hugs.
When I ask questions, everyone shrugs.
Who will answer questions for me?
Pastor Roland is there for thee.

But I don't have much money today
I can only afford a frappuccino
or a small bottle of vino.
Maybe a 99 cent download tune
And I need a bottle of shampoo.

What can I do?
If I can only afford a dollar or two?

No problem.
Pastor Ro is there for you.

He is really nice
to those who can't afford a higher price
Buy Pastor a 2 dollar cup of coffee
He'll answer your question with happily.

You've got to be kidding?
No, it's absolutely true.
Pastor Ro is there for you

For a two dollar donation
He'll answer your question
Without hesitation.

Of course, it's not counseling or therapy
It's for fun and education
And common sense practicality.
Like writing to Dear Abby

So get your question ready.
Hold your Ipad steady.
Click on the keyboard image,
And don't forget to eat your spinach.

He's got you covered in San Francisco,
Kansas and Texas,
Hello Frisco.
Rio, Toronto and Timbuktu,
Pastor Roland has answers for you,
And maybe a blessing too.

Powered byEMF Forms Builder

Report Abuse

ADHD Success Story - Michael Carlos Simon's New Book is His Powerful Personal Testimony

2012-01-30T16:39:00.000-08:00

“How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.”

Mike’s Story is the powerful personal testimony of someone who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to enjoy a successful, productive life. Mike tells you about his childhood:
the traumas,
the obsessions and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.

Mike tells
you about his twenties:
the depression,
the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk
about how Zorro and Columbo
helped him get through.
You’ll find out what the Zen Master
said.

You’ll read about Mike’s
close call with Dr. Rough
Handling.

Mike loves to
philosophize about life, love, and
he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals
how he moved on and left the
issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of
meditation, a change of heart, a
hug and a kick in the pants from God

Co-authored by Roland Trujillo, pastor, mentor and author of 12 books. Roland helped Mike put the book together and Roland wrote two special chapters.

His popular self help radio program has aired on both secular and Christian radio stations around the country for 22 years. “I love helping people improve their relationships, overcome personal issues and find their spiritual roots. People get stuck, and they need someone who thinks outside the box to help them look at life with fresh eyes. People are resilient and can make progress in a very short amount of time. Sometimes all it takes is an insight or two, a little meditation to get centered, and knowing that there is someone who has love,and who both understands and can help. That’s all.

Mike’s Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.” is the powerful personal testimony of someone who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to enjoy a successful, productive life.

Mike tells you about his childhood:

the traumas,
the obsessions
and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.
Mike tells you about his twenties: the
depression, the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk about how Zorro and Colombo helped him get through.

You’ll find out what the Zen Master said.

You’ll read about Mike’s close call with Dr. Rough Handling.

Mike loves to philosophize about life, love,

and he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals how he moved on and left the issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of meditation,
a change of heart,
and a hug and a kick in the pants from God.

I have discovered that the secret to life is in overlooking.

You have anxiety, but overlook it. In other words, instead of struggling with, suppressing or trying to get rid of the anxiety, you overlook it.

There are many good things I could say about overlooking. How it helps us overcome anxiety, doubts, fears, negative emotion; and how it helps us be more patient with others. But for now, I will mention it in passing. Later I will talk about the meditation (that Roland offers) and how it helps you learn to overlook. . . . . .

When I was 10, 15, 20, 30 years old, did I have anxiety? Of course. Did I get depressed? Of course.

When my parents got divorced, it bothered me. When my dad died, it made me sad. When my parakeet died, I felt bad. What was I supposed to do, be happy about these things? I grieved and felt hurt and then I got over it.

When I was a little kid, did I go through a spell where I had to do a ritual of counting numbers or arrange my shoes perfectly at night or else "something really bad would happen?" Of course. Then I grew out of it.

When I was in college, was I high and hyper when something good happened and stayed up till dawn talking to my friends? Then did I crash when a bunch of things went wrong? Naturally.

When I was in my 20's did I wonder who I was and if there was a future for me? Did I mess up, and make mistakes? Sure.

And then did something try to tell me I was "worthless" and that "the world would be better off without me?" Of course.

When I was 30 and sitting in a lonely apartment in the outskirts of Chicago, with the snow coming down and nowhere to go and wishing I were back in California, did I feel depressed? Of course.

But here I am. I got through.

My recovery was two part. First it was just growing out of issues. Secondly, it was a spiritual awakening when I was 40 years old.

Mike's Story is now available in both eBook and quality paperback

216 pages

Special Offer:

For a donation of $10, we will send you a pdf eBook of Mike's Story by email.

Read more

Mike's Story: How I Overcame Mental Health and Other Issues is now available at Amazon

2012-01-30T09:33:00.000-08:00

“How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.”

Mike’s Story is the powerful personal testimony of someone who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to enjoy a successful, productive life. Mike tells you about his
childhood:
the traumas,
the obsessions and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.

Mike tells
you about his twenties:
the depression,
the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk
about how Zorro and Columbo
helped him get through.
You’ll find out what the Zen Master
said.

You’ll read about Mike’s
close call with Dr. Rough
Handling.

Mike loves to
philosophize about life, love, and
he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals
how he moved on and left the
issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of
meditation, a change of heart, a
hug and a kick in the pants from God

Mike’s Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.” is the powerful personal testimony of someone who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to enjoy a successful, productive life.

Mike's Story is now available in paperback at Amazon

Mike tells you about his childhood:

the traumas,
the obsessions
and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.
Mike tells you about his twenties: the
depression, the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk about how Zorro and Colombo helped him get through.

You’ll find out what the Zen Master said.

You’ll read about Mike’s close call with Dr. Rough Handling.

Mike loves to philosophize about life, love,

and he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals how he moved on and left the issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of meditation,
a change of heart,
and a hug and a kick in the pants from God.

I have discovered that the secret to life is in overlooking.

You have anxiety, but overlook it. In other words, instead of struggling with, suppressing or trying to get rid of the anxiety, you overlook it.

Mike's Story is now available at Amazon in quality paperback edition

Special Offer:

For a donation of $10, we will send you a pdf eBook of Mike's Story by email.

Overcoming Anxiety, Worry and Fear - What the Christian Mystics Have to Say

2012-01-28T19:20:00.000-08:00

The prayer of faith is a sincere, sweet, and quiet
view of divine, eternal truth.
The soul rests quiet, perceiving and loving God;
sweetly rejecting all the imaginations
that present themselves,
calming the mind in the Divine presence,
and fixing it only on God.

Miguel de Molinos.

Every morning compose your soul for a tranquil day,
and all through it be careful often to recall your resolution,
and bring yourself back to it, so to say. If something
discomposes you, do not be upset, or troubled; but
having discovered the fact, humble yourself gently
before God, and try to bring your mind into a quiet attitude.
Say to yourself, "Well, I have made a false step;
now I must go more carefully and watchfully."
Do this each time, however frequently you fall.
When you are at peace use it profitably, making
constant acts of meekness, and seeking to be calm
even in the most trifling things. Above all, do not be
discouraged; be patient; wait;
strive to attain a calm, gentle spirit.

ST. FRANCIS DE SALES.

Am I acting in simplicity, from a germ of the Divine life within,
or am I shaping my path to obtain
some immediate result of expediency?
Am I endeavoring to compass effects, amidst a tangled web
of foreign influences I cannot calculate;
or am I seeking simply to do what is right,
and leaving the consequences to the good providence of God?

M. A. Schimmekpenninck.

The soul ceases to weary itself with planning and foreseeing,
giving itself up to God's Holy Spirit within, and to the teachings
of His providence without. He is not forever fretting as to
his progress, or looking back to see how far he is getting on;
rather he goes steadily and quietly on, and makes
all the more progress because it is unconscious.
So he never gets troubled and discouraged;
if he falls he humbles himself, but gets up at once,
and goes on with renewed earnestness.

Jean Nicolas, Grou.

I had found [communion with God] to consist,
not only in the silencing of the outward man,
but in the silencing also of every thought, and
in the concentration of the soul and all its powers
into a simple, quiet watching and waiting for
the food which its heavenly Father might see fit
either to give or to withhold. In no case could it
be sent empty away; for, if comfort, light, or joy
were withheld, the act of humble waiting at the gate
of heavenly wisdom could not but work patience in it,
and thus render it, by humility and obedience, more
"meet to be a partaker of the inheritance of the saints in light,"
and also more blessed in itself.

M. A. Kelty.

Roland Trujillo MS, D. Pastoral Psychology and author of 12 books is one of the world's foremost authorities on Christian Mindfulness Meditation.

Mike's Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs”

is now available in eBook to download to your computer, read online, or download to your mobile device right now!

Mike’s Story “How I overcame depression,
bipolar, OCD, anxiety and other
issues without drugs.” is the powerful personal testimony of someone
who overcame mental health and other issues and went on to
enjoy a successful, productive life.

Mike tells you about his childhood:

the traumas,
the obsessions
and compulsions,
his shyness and bipolar.
Mike tells you about his twenties: the
depression, the doubts and the fears.

You will hear him talk about how Zorro and Colombo helped him get through.

You’ll find out what the Zen Master said.

You’ll read about Mike’s close call with Dr. Rough Handling.

Mike loves to philosophize about life, love,

and he likes Frank Sinatra too.

For each stage of his life he reveals how he moved on and left the issues behind.

Mike saves the best for last:

How he found his
spiritual roots with the help of meditation,
a change of heart,
and a hug and a kick in the pants from God.

Preview now

Roland Trujillo, pastor, mentor and spiritual
director, is the author of 12 books. His popular self
help radio program has aired on both secular and
Christian radio stations around the country for 22
years.

“I love helping people improve their
relationships, overcome personal issues and find
their spiritual roots. People get stuck, and they need
someone who thinks outside the box to help
them look at life with fresh eyes.

People are resilient and can make progress in a very short amount of time.
Sometimes all it takes is an insight or two,
a little meditation to get centered, and knowing that there is someone
who has love, and who both understands
and can help. That’s all.

Immediate Relationship Advice - Fast, Affordable and Friendly

2012-01-27T08:08:00.000-08:00

Do you have a marriage or relationship issue you would like
like some feedback on, guidance, or a second opinion from a professional counselor?

Why talk to anyone else when you can talk to Roland who is the author of 12 books and has 22 years experience advising on relationship and marriage issues. His radio advice program has been on the air 22 years.

"I'm a counselor and an ordained minister too." says Roland who has an earned MS in Human Relations and a Doctorate in Pastoral Psychology.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program, books, articles, and private counsel for 22 years.

Many people want to talk to someone. They want to tell someone about something they want to get off their mind. They want to start moving forward. They want a person who is concerned, trustworthy, and sincere.

But they don't want to talk to just "someone" like some unknown counselor, prayer partner or faceless person. They don't want to talk to someone who is just getting started and doesn't have the wisdom and understanding of years. They want to talk to someone who has experience and who is mature. Someone solid and with some authority.

Others want to talk now and not next week. Some people are home bound. Some people want to get started now. They also like to be able to pick someone they are comfortable with.

It is for this reason that I am here.

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues.

Get in touch with Roland using our easy

Online Counseling for a Donation

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

I am available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and confidential. Chat in confidence, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 12 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

Some of the issues I've helped people with include:

resolving unhappiness and re-finding joy

strategies to improve communication

arguing in marriage

different styles and interests

avoiding divorce

how to forgive and forget

coping with infidelity

in law issues

work/home balance

common sense positive parenting

reconciliation

dating and courtship issues

Contact me today and get started solving issues and re-finding fulfillment and purpose

There are two options

Option One

Got a relationship question? A marriage issue you would like another opinion on? Want to work on your relationship?

If you feel comfortable making a small donation at Paypal, you can get an answer right away.

Click on the relationships chat link, tell Roland you want some feedback for a donation. It's that simple.

(We do not offer free advice. Donation only).

(you must be 19, no emergencies)

Click To Chat

Roland, I'm interested. Tell me more.

" I have found that most people on the internet don't want spend much or anything at all. People want things for free. I have so many free self help resources (and I have for 22 years) - it is amazing. But I cannot give away professional counseling. I rely solely on the donations of visitors and listeners.

People are looking for real meaningful answers from a professional. I can't give it away - if I do I would soon be out of money. Plus free seems to invite pranksters and people who are not serious.

There has to be a solution, and there is. I devote some time each day to helping people and answering questions for a donation. (Even $5 helps pay for the chat service).

So get your answer and help me too. It's a win win.

How much do people donate?

Most people donate $15 or $20 for up to half an hour. Some people are generous and donate more. Others have a very tight budget and can only donate $5 or 10$.

Please be fair. If you can afford $5 for a Subway sandwich, you can afford to help Roland.

If you prefer pay as you go -- where you pay minute by minute and leave when you want. You are in charge of how long the session is. Visit my virtual office at LivePerson.

If you want to remain anonymous, where even the expert doesn't know who you are, then LivePerson is for you.

Option Two

Prefer email? Send me an email, tell me you want relationship or marriage advice for a donation. Briefly state your issue and I will respond. (you must be 19, no emergencies).

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program, books, articles, and private counseling for 22 years."

__________________________________

The quickest way to get in touch with Roland right away is to click on the Chat Link.

You must be 19. No emergencies, no crisis, and no abuse or violence issues.

It's a win-win. You get to contact Roland and get information. Then you can make a small donation if you are satisfied with the answer.

We do not handle emergencies or crises.

We do not offer free counseling.
We do offer free customer service:
you can ask about your issue and whether
pastoral counseling for a donation is right for you.

If pastoral counseling and advice is right for you, then you can tell Roland what donation you can afford. (Roland is supported solely by donations from visitors)

Most counselors and advisors ask for fees of $60 to over $100 per hour. How about mechanics, plumbers, electricians, and accountants? How about your beautician?

Roland makes his service available for a donation and he is open to sliding scale for people with tight budgets.

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

Roland is the author of 12 books, with 22 years experience. Roland has an earned MS and a Doctorate in Pastoral Counseling. He is board certified as a professional counselor.

There are two options

Option One

For a donation you can chat (texting) with me.

Option Two

For a donation you can have an email exchange. Just email Roland and tell him you want an answer by email for a donation.

Just click here to donate
,

Thank you

Internet Pastor Online for Christian Counseling and Free Self Help Resources

2012-01-22T14:27:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting in my office and it is raining outside. So far today I've had many visitors, one missed chat, and one email question from someone who needed some advice about a parent/adult child issue.

It has been a bit quiet, so I want to make sure people know that they should bookmark this site or save it in their favorites.

This is a friendly place where you get information and self help resources. You get free articles to read, books to preview and audio to listen to about life's most important issues.

Not only that but you can chat to me and ask me a Bible question free.
You can ask about counseling. You can listen to the meditation.

Then if you have gotten some answers, maybe even started to use our meditation, if you need a little extra help, you can contact me for pastoral advice.

A visitor who, for example, has been a back slider, or who wants to calm down and find peace of mind, or someone who wants to let go of anger and negative emotions can get a good handle on things by practicing the meditation, listening to some of my radio programs, and buying one or two of my books.

Having made great progress, this person may still have a sticky issue that some counseling would help with. That's what I'm here for.

A person can listen to my radio programs, practice the meditation, read my books, and read some of my blogs and make progress, even life transforming progress,
without even having talked to me.

I have been helping people for 22 years.

So get started, take advantage of the resources here.

But if you are not ready or are just checking things out--go ahead. Just remember where I am, in case you need me in the future.

_______________________________

"Why talk to just anyone when you can talk to a Senior Pastor?" says Pastor Roland who has an earned MS and PhD in Pastoral Counseling.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program, books, articles, and private counseling for 22 years.

We offer an outstanding array of free audio sermons, articles, a meditation to calm down, and even some free books to read online.

"This is the finest personal pastoral service on the web today."

__________________________________

The quickest way to get in touch with Roland right away is to click on the Free Chat Customer Service icon in the right sidebar.

You must be 19. No emergencies, no crisis, and no abuse or violence issues.

It is a free way to contact Roland for customer service information.

Ask your question.

If it is a quick Bible answer or Roland has a resource to tell you about--

You got an answer free.

If your issue is one where Roland has to give you more of his time and some pastoral counseling, then Roland will tell you

and you can decide if you want to continue for a modest donation.

It's a win-win. You get to contact Roland free and get information. Then you can decide if you would like some pastoral counseling or advice for a donation, and you can continue if you want to.

We do not handle emergencies or crises.

We do not offer free counseling.

We do offer a free quick answer
for a Bible question
or Christian walk question
for educational purposes only

We do offer free customer service:
you can ask about your issue and whether
pastoral counseling for a donation is right for you.

If pastoral counseling and advice is right for you, then you can tell Roland what donation you can afford. (Roland is supported solely by donations from visitors)

Most counselors and advisors ask for fees of $60 to over $100 per hour. How about mechanics, plumbers, electricians, and accountants?

Roland makes his service available for a donation and he is open to sliding scale for people with tight budgets.

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

Roland is the author of 12 books, with 22 years experience. Roland has an earned MS and a Doctorate in Pastoral Counseling. He is board certified as a professional counselor.

Relationship and marriage issues

Courtship, choosing the right partner
Help with marital unhappiness or infidelity issues
Feedback on depression, bipolar, OCD, and anxiety from a pastor's perspective

Help overcoming drug and alcohol issues

Overcoming emotional issues, such as unhappiness, upset, anger, or anxiety
Letting go of doubts and fears
People who don't want a record of their issue following them around.
Parenting issues, blended families, single parenting
Religious questions you've always wanted to ask
Questions you would like to ask a pastor even though you are not involved in any religion.
How to cope with stress from a pastor's perspective
Overcoming feelings of inferiority or insecurity.
Executives, clergy, actors, prominent people, entertainers, attorneys who want confidential counseling

Do you have a marriage or relationship issue you would like
like some feedback on, guidance, or a second opinion from a professional Christian counselor? Would you like to talk to someone about the Christian walk, back sliding, substance issues, stress or unhappiness?

Why talk to anyone else when you can talk to a Senior Pastor. Many people have a marriage or relationship issue and would like to talk to a pastor, but they prefer to do so confidentially. They like their pastor but they don't want him to know. Other people are between churches, don't have a church, or just want to talk to a professional who is open to religion and spirituality.

"I'm a pastor." says Pastor Roland who has an earned MS and Doctorate in Pastoral Counseling. I am a spiritual care giver and I can also direct people to resources to get their questions answered.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program for 22 years.

Many people want to talk to a priest or pastor. They have a spiritual issue they are dealing with or they need some feedback or counsel. They want to tell someone about something they want to get off their mind. They want to start moving forward. They want a person who is concerned, trustworthy, and sincere.

But they don't want to talk to just "someone" like some unknown counselor, prayer partner or faceless person. They don't want to talk to someone who is just getting started and doesn't have the wisdom and understanding of years. They want to talk to someone who has experience and who is mature. Someone solid and with some authority.

Others want to talk now and not next week. Some people are home bound. Some people want to get started now. They also like to be able to pick someone they are comfortable with.

It is for this reason that I am here.

If you would like prayer, click on the prayer request tab at the top of the page.

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues.

Get in touch with Roland for pastoral counseling or advice to get some feedback using

Online Counseling for a Donation

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

I am available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and confidential. Chat in confidence, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 12 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

There are two options

Option One

For a donation you can chat (texting) with me.

Option Two

For a donation you can have an email exchange to ask your question, present your issue, and get an answer.

Just click here to donate
,

Thank you

Roland is available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and ultra confidential. Chat in confidence, anonymity, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 11 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

I'm the only Senior Pastor with over 20 years experience who devotes himself full time 7 days a week to helping people on the internet

We all need help sometimes or could use a little professional feedback. Maybe you want to talk to someone but don't want them to know who you are.

Right now you just want a little guidance on some issue with no strings attached

Perhaps you would just like some feedback from the convenience of home. That's what I'm here for.

Your friend,

Pastor Roland

Finally, Affordable Professional Christian Counseling Online

2012-01-20T11:21:00.000-08:00

"Why talk to just anyone when you can talk to a Senior Pastor?" says Pastor Roland who has an earned MS and PhD in Pastoral Counseling.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program, books, articles, and private counseling for 22 years.

I offer two tiers of service.

Top Flight: I offer professional pastoral counseling 7 days a week for personal issues and feedback via texting, Skype, phone, and email.

Second tier: free live chat Sundays and most days when I'm available for a general or a Bible question you'd like to ask. (you must be 18, no emergencies, no counseling. Just a question for a pastor).

We also offer an outstanding array of free audio sermons, articles, a meditation to calm down, and even some free books to read online.

"This is the finest personal pastoral service on the web today."

__________________________________

The quickest way to get in touch with Roland right away is to click on the Free Chat Customer Service icon in the right sidebar.

You must be 18. No emergencies, no crisis, and no abuse or violence issues.

It is a free way to contact Roland for customer service information.

Ask your question.

If it is a quick Bible answer or Roland has a resource to tell you about--

You got an answer free.

If your issue is one where Roland has to give you more of his time and some pastoral counseling, then Roland will tell you

and you can decide if you want to continue for a modest donation.

It's a win-win. You get to contact Roland free and get information. Then you can decide if you would like some pastoral counseling or advice for a donation, and you can continue if you want to.

Just to make it clear.

We do not handle emergencies or crises.

We do not offer free counseling.

We do offer a free quick answer
for a Bible question
or Christian walk question
for educational purposes only

We do offer free customer service:
you can ask about your issue and whether
pastoral counseling for a donation is right for you.

If pastoral counseling and advice is right for you, then you can tell Roland what donation you can afford. (Roland is supported solely by donations from visitors)

Most counselors and advisors ask for fees of $60 to over $100 per hour. How about mechanics, plumbers, electricians, and accountants?

Roland makes his service available for a donation and he is open to sliding scale for people with tight budgets.

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

Roland is the author of 12 books, with 22 years experience. Roland has an earned MS and a Doctorate in Pastoral Counseling. He is board certified as a professional counselor.

Relationship and marriage issues

Courtship, choosing the right partner

Help with marital unhappiness or infidelity issues

Feedback on depression, bipolar, OCD, and anxiety from a pastor's perspective

Help overcoming drug and alcohol issues

Overcoming emotional issues, such as unhappiness, upset, anger, or anxiety

Letting go of doubts and fears

People who don't want a record of their issue following them around.

Parenting issues, blended families, single parenting

Religious questions you've always wanted to ask

Questions you would like to ask a pastor even though you are not involved in any religion.

How to cope with stress from a pastor's perspective

Overcoming feelings of inferiority or insecurity.

Executives, clergy, actors, prominent people, entertainers, attorneys who want confidential counseling

Do you have a marriage or relationship issue you would like
like some feedback on, guidance, or a second opinion from a professional Christian counselor? Would you like to talk to someone about the Christian walk, back sliding, substance issues, stress or unhappiness?

Why talk to anyone else when you can talk to a Senior Pastor. Many people have a marriage or relationship issue and would like to talk to a pastor, but they prefer to do so confidentially. They like their pastor but they don't want him to know. Other people are between churches, don't have a church, or just want to talk to a professional who is open to religion and spirituality.

"I'm a pastor." says Pastor Roland who has an earned MS and Doctorate in Pastoral Counseling. I am a spiritual care giver and I can also direct people to resources to get their questions answered.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program for 22 years.

Many people want to talk to a priest or pastor. They have a spiritual issue they are dealing with or they need some feedback or counsel. They want to tell someone about something they want to get off their mind. They want to start moving forward. They want a person who is concerned, trustworthy, and sincere.

But they don't want to talk to just "someone" like some unknown counselor, prayer partner or faceless person. They don't want to talk to someone who is just getting started and doesn't have the wisdom and understanding of years. They want to talk to someone who has experience and who is mature. Someone solid and with some authority.

Others want to talk now and not next week. Some people are home bound. Some people want to get started now. They also like to be able to pick someone they are comfortable with.

It is for this reason that I am here.

If you would like prayer, click on the prayer request tab at the top of the page.

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues.

Get in touch with Roland for pastoral counseling or advice to get some feedback using

Online Counseling for a Donation

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

I am available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and confidential. Chat in confidence, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 12 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

There are two options

Option One

For a donation of $19.50 you can chat (texting) with me for up to 60 minutes. And as a bonus, receive a free ebook of my new book The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage. All for only $19.50. Just donate below using Paypal and I will contact you by email within 24 hours to arrange for your personal and confidential chat session.

Question: "Pastor, can I divide my 60 minutes into 2 or 3 sessions? Like two 30 minute sessions?"
Answer: Absolutely. In fact that sound's like a great idea and many people prefer two or three shorter sessions over a two week period. (It gives them time to read my free book too!)

Option Two

For a donation of $22.50 you can have 4 email exchanges (four in and four out) for a one month period. You will also be entitled to one free 20 minute chat session. You will also receive a free ebook. All for only $22.50 Just donate below at Paypal and I will contact you by email within 24 hours about getting started right away.

Just click here to donate
,

Thank you

Roland is available 7 days a week for your convenience.
"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and ultra confidential. Chat in confidence, anonymity, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a Board Certified Professional Counselor. I am the author of 11 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

I'm the only Senior Pastor with over 20 years experience who devotes himself full time 7 days a week to helping people on the internet

We all need help sometimes or could use a little professional feedback. Maybe you want to talk to someone but don't want them to know who you are.

Right now you just want a little guidance on some issue with no strings attached

Perhaps you would just like some feedback from the convenience of home. That's what I'm here for.

Your friend,

Pastor Roland

Inspiration and Education for True Meditation

2012-01-19T20:22:00.000-08:00

This deliverance of the soul
from all useless and selfish and unquiet cares,
brings to it an unspeakable peace and freedom;
this is true simplicity.

This state of entire resignation and perpetual
acquiescence produces true liberty;
and this liberty brings perfect simplicity.

The soul which knows no self-seeking,
no interested ends, is thoroughly candid;
it goes straight forward without hindrance;
its path opens daily more and more to "perfect day,"
in proportion as its self-renunciation and
its self-forgetfulness increase;
and its peace, amid whatever troubles beset it,
will be as boundless as the depths of the sea.

FRANCOIS DE LA MOTHE FENELON.

Christian Meditation - Yes There is Such a Thing

2012-01-19T16:45:00.000-08:00

Here are some of my favorite wonderful quotes. These people get it.

There is another kind of silence to be cultivated, besides that of the tongue as regards others. I mean silence as regards one's self--restraining the imagination, not permitting it to dwell overmuch on what we have heard or said, not indulging in the phantasmagoria of
picture-thoughts, whether of the past or future.

Be sure that you have made no small progress in the spiritual life, when you can control your imagination, so as to fix it on the duty and occupation actually existing, to the exclusion of the crowd of thoughts which are perpetually sweeping across the mind.

No doubt, you cannot prevent those thoughts from arising, but you can prevent yourself from dwelling on them; you can put them aside, you can check the self-complacency, or irritation, or earthly longings which feed them, and by the practice of such control of your thoughts you will attain that spirit of inward silence which draws the soul into a close intercourse with God.

JEAN N. GROU.

Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable
in Thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.
Psalm 19, verse 14.

The thoughts that in our hearts keep place,
Lord, make a holy, heavenly throng,
And steep in innocence and grace
The issue of each guarded tongue.

T. H. GILL.

Dr. Roland Trujillo, MS, D. Pastoral Psychology is one of the world's foremost experts on Christian meditation. He has been helping people for 22 years and is the author of 12 books on meditation, post traumatic stress, and spiritual recovery

I Will Sing You a Song of That Beautiful Land

2012-01-19T16:44:00.001-08:00

Do Angels Exist?

2012-01-19T16:42:00.000-08:00

Dear Pastor Roland,

Do angels exist? I think they do but some people say they don't. What do you think?

Dear Listener,

Of course they do!

I'm sure that one is watching over you and me right now. Never mind what what others say. Some people don't like pizza either.

The Good Lord watches over us, but I'm sure that He gets busy. So He created lots of angels and they love to watch over people. They are very beautiful, wise, and sweet, but they are also very strong. Best not to mess with one.

I'm glad there are angels.

Your friend,

Pastor Roland

Talk to a Pastor with Skype

2012-01-19T15:31:00.000-08:00

I am now counseling and advising with Skype.

Click on the contact button and send me an email. Briefly tell me your issue, and also tell me a good time to reach you at Skype. If I feel your issue is one I may be able to advise on, I will send you an email and ask you to use the donate button to make a donation at Paypal of $12.00.

After receiving notification of the donation, I will contact you to arrange your first get acquainted Skype session.

The modest $12 fee assures that I will set aside up to 20 minutes for your introductory get acquainted session.

If there is another session, the fee is negotiable. Generally a rule of thumb is $30 for per half hour, but I am open to sliding scale for people with a tight budget.

So if you would like some feed back and another opinion on some issue, and you can afford $12 for the first session, get started now. Send me an email

Just click here to donate
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Thank you

The "Why I Hate Religion But Love Jesus" Video - A Pastor's Review

2012-01-18T15:07:00.000-08:00

Today I heard about the YouTube video Why I Hate Religion But Love Jesus. I heard about it on Christian radio, and being an Internet pastor, I wanted to watch it to find out what all the hype was about. You can also watch it right here before you read my review and comments. Over 14 million people have viewed it.

I frankly found it rather mild. I have much stronger things to say in the book I co-authored with my friend Mike, who overcame depression, anxiety, bipolar, and other issues without drugs.

I do not know the person in the video and whether he is sincere or whether he is just seeking to generate publicity. I will give him the benefit of the doubt, and assume he is a just a decent young guy. He has a right to his opinion, and like I said--I don't see anything controversial about it myself.

It is clear to me that the church--whatever that is--is not the same thing as a true Christian or several true Christians. If there is anything organized today that is akin to the early Christian church, it would be the house churches in Communist countries.

I believe that true religion is the relationship between a soul and its Maker. It is something like the ancient Patriarchs or the prophets had. Take for example, someone like Elijah, who walked with God and was taken up into Heaven and didn't even see death. He didn't go to church. He wasn't involved in some organized group.

When people ask me if I am a Christian, I always tell them: "I'm a believer but not a belonger. "

My church is wherever I am. I worship God when I am grateful for the morning or hear the robin sing.

But having said this, I must also say that some of my dearest friends are members of organized Christianity. While it is true that just because people appear to be a nice person on the outside, they may not be nice inside--I must quickly say that a person may appear to be a nice person and a good Christian on the outside AND also really be a good person on the inside.

For example, I am a student of the mystical tradition--those people who found a real sublime rapport with God, who tried to tell others about what they found, but were hard pressed to do so. These were saints inside and out. They were full of love and never hurt a flea, they did a lot of good, and they remained a part of organized religion.

I will give you two examples--August Graf von Galen (March 16, 1878 – March 22, 1946) was a German count, Bishop of Münster, and Cardinal of the Roman Catholic Church. Cardinal Von Galen, who stood up against the Nazis and dared to tell the people that the Nazis were secretly doing away with mentally disabled people. This noble man was a champion of good and he was also a priest.

Another example is François Fénelon (6 August 1651 – 7 January 1715), a French Roman Catholic, Cardinal Fenelon who found the inner way to God and who numbered among his friends one of my favorite ladies of all time, Madame Guyon, whose book Finding God in Prayer is one of the classics in spirituality. She was too wasboth a Catholic and a inwardly noble woman.

My fellow Christians, inside organized religion or outside organized religion, are those people of goodwill who love God with all their heart, and who seek to be fair with people.

My kindred spirits are also those people who are skeptics or agnostics but who are sincerely searching for the truth and will honor the truth when they hear it.

My solidarity is with anyone--regardless of race, relgion or national origin--who seeks truth, loves justice, and abhors cruelty and deceit.

I consider people from around the world who love children as my brothers and sisters.

Possession and Exorcism, Part 2

2012-01-17T08:43:00.000-08:00

Many people are interested in the topics of possession and exorcism, especially when a new movie comes out. I recall the groundswell of interest when, many years ago, the original The Exorcist movie was a hit.

Since then there have been others, such as The Last Exorcism and The Exorcism of Emily Rose.

The basic plot for The Devil Inside is intriguing to me because, as I understand it, it is about some legitimate exorcists who seek to help a person who is possessed but who has been labeled insane. Truth is often stranger than fiction. The premise that people who are said to be insane but are actually possessed or perhaps bothered by some untoward spiritual force is not as far out as it might appear.

Today we use soft language, euphemisms, and jargon to describe things. If a person has a problem, they have an "issue." If a kid is being teased and put down, and he becomes angry, he is said to have oppositional disorder. Maybe he sees injustice and is just plain angry.

If someone hears voices, they are said to have auditory hallucinations. What if they really are hearing voices? But this is too threatening to say or even suggest. When an alternative view of such a thing is portrayed in a movie, it is less threatening when the question is raised "what if some people diagnosed with a mental disorder don't have a mental disorder but are being harassed by spiritual forces? "

I wish to say a little about it so that some who are looking for truthful and accurate information about possession and exorcism may find this post. There is plenty of misinformation and misunderstanding out there. so let me begin by pointing out what is not accurate.

On the one extreme there are those who say that possession is a myth, fantasy or the result of some mere psychological process. But the truth is that there is such a thing as possession. There is partial possession and perfect possession.

Mostly, it's not a question of possession but of harassment. People are bothered, harassed or visited by malevolent and mischievous spiritual forces. For example, many people have had the experience, at some point in their life, of seeing a dark looming sinister figure appear in their room at night. Others have awakened to an oppressive sensation of something on being on top of them.

People, and far more than you would suspect, at some point in their life have heard something being said to them in their mind.

Have you ever asked yourself why the things that are said are often negative, mean, tormenting, or urging us on to do something self destructive?

The question is: if it is our very own thinking, why can't we control it at will and just make it stop?

One person had a voice urging him to take take some illegal drug, and then after he became hooked on the drug the same voice told him he was no good and urged him to do away with himself!

Fortunately, he did not, and then it went away and he is fine today.

I have to say, however, that evil is very subtle. Its suggestions may even appear beneficial, especially when we are in accord with them. One of the victims in the book Hostage to the Devil became enamored of some alternative form of spirituality.

He thought it was progressive and good, but it was actually a subtly twisted version of true spirituality. This person led many astray and only much later became aware that he was being guided by something malevolent.

So there is a spectrum of such phenomena, ranging from, at the low end of the spectrum, a naughty voice saying something bad will happen unless we perform a ritual to undo something we did, to a voice urging us to do something like take drugs or be promiscuous to, at the other end of the spectrum, something urging us to hurt ourselves or hurt another person.

The above listed phenomena are more along the lines of harassment than they are possession.

There is also the situation where something malevolent can get in during a moment of personal weakness, such as during a forbidden act, while taking drugs, in some bizarre ritual, or in an emotional moment at the bedside of a dying person where the malevolent spirit jumps from, for example, a dying mother to her daughter who is standing at the bedside. Afterwards the daughter does not feel right and senses something wrong inside. The daughter in this example, a decent person, will surely be troubled and tormented.

Possession in the classic sense is more than harassment, it is a take over. But one that often occurs slowly, almost imperceptibly, and every so incrementally over a long period of time.

It often begins through sin, through forbidden acts, through desire, and through resentment and hate, where each step of the way we give in or go along with some mental suggestion or pressure.

More often than not, the victim gives in to suggestions that make a personal seductive appeal to what the person secretly desires, and there is often the promise of doing great things together, getting in on the ground floor of something big, or doing something very pleasurable or exciting. It poses as a friend, a confidant, a mentor, even a spirit guide. It starts off as a friend, and it is only once it has staked its claim or when the victim begins to want to get free that the dark, vicious side shows itself.

Bear in mind that a perfectly possessed person, who is in agreement with the ideas and will of the possessing entity, could be a pillar of society. He appears perfectly normal to everyone and masquerades and functions as a solid citizen and no one suspects that he is a sociopath. The only thing is that his rights are your wrongs, and he quietly works to undermine good cause or enterprise, to destroy innocence, and promote some agenda that is in accord with Satan's will. No exorcism will work for this person.

Now that I have briefly mentioned spiritual factors that make it possible for the need for a legitimate exorcism, I have to say that a very large percentage of what passes for exorcism is fraudulent and foolish, even dangerous.

There are meddlers, charlatans, fools, psychotics, religious nuts, and wicked people who tend to get in the news with big displays of alleged exorcisms. They make it into a circus sideshow and deceive many. There are foolish amateurs who have no business being involved in these matters at all, who think they see possession in someone or who try to do exorcisms.

My stern warning to anyone who is even thinking about getting involved in doing some sort of exorcism is: do not.

Do not get involved in these matters. Let the highly trained mental health professionals, medical practitioners, and social service providers assist people who are in danger of hurting themselves or others. Do not interfere.

For those who perhaps saw the movie and would like to read a serious, interesting, and authoritative discussion and portrayal of possession and exorcism, may I recommend the book Hostage to the Devil by the late Malachi Martin.

Malachi Martin was a Catholic priest, who participated in and conducted many exorcisms. He was also a consultant to the original exorcism movie. The book describes the possession and exorcism of 5 contemporary Americans.

Possession is discussed in a meaningful and accurate way. The subtle and personal nature of evil and how it insinuates itself a little at a time is talked about. We are also told of the subtle pride or error in judgment that left the people vulnerable to possession.

Father Martin is very measured and professional in his discussion, and his activities were always and only after a thorough examination of the allegedly possessed person was undertaken by mental health professionals and a physician, and in consultation with them.

The book may be available at some public libraries to read for free, and of course to purchase at Amazon.com or other retailers.

Lord, I know not what I ought to ask of Thee

2012-01-16T18:20:00.001-08:00

Lord, I know not what I ought to ask of Thee;
Thou only knowest what I need; Thou lovest
me better than I know how to love myself.
O Father! give to Thy child that which he himself
knows not how to ask. I dare not ask either for
crosses or consolations; I simply present myself
before Thee; I open my heart to Thee.
Behold my needs which I know not myself;
see, and do according to Thy tender mercy.
Smite, or heal; depress me, or raise me up;
I adore all Thy purposes without knowing them;
I am silent; I offer myself in sacrifice;
I yield myself to Thee; I would have no other
desire than to accomplish Thy will.
Teach me to pray;
pray Thyself in me.

FRANCOIS DE LA MOTHE FENELON.

Your heavenly Father knoweth
that ye have need of all these things.

MATTHEW 6, verse 32.

All as God wills, who wisely heeds
To give or to withhold;
And knoweth more of all my needs
Than all my prayers have told.

J. G. WHITTIER.

We Are Still Accepting Prayer Requests

2012-01-16T18:08:00.000-08:00

"I need someone to pray for me."

Would you like Pastor Roland to say a prayer for you? Send Pastor Roland an email.

Tell him your first name and what you want him to pray for.
Pastor Roland will say a prayer for you.

What a friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer!
Oh, what peace we often forfeit,
Oh, what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in prayer!

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful,
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy-laden,
Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield thee,
Thou wilt find a solace there.

Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised
Thou wilt all our burdens bear;
May we ever, Lord, be bringing
All to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright, unclouded,
There will be no need for prayer—
Rapture, praise, and endless worship
Will be our sweet portion there.

"The shortest distance between your problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and the floor."

"The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." James 5:16

1 Thessalonians 2: 3-13

For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you. 4 On the contrary, we speak as men approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please men but God, who tests our hearts. 5 You know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greed—God is our witness. 6 We were not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else.

As apostles of Christ we could have been a burden to you, 7 but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children. 8 We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us. 9 Surely you remember, brothers, our toil and hardship; we worked night and day in order not to be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you.

10 You are witnesses, and so is God, of how holy, righteous and blameless we were among you who believed. 11 For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, 12 encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory.

13 And we also thank God continually because, when you received the word of God, which you heard from us, you accepted it not as the word of men, but as it actually is, the word of God, which is at work in you who believe.

Pastoral and Spiritual Counseling - Pastor Online

2012-01-15T14:45:00.000-08:00

Hi, my name is Pastor Roland. I am a Senior Pastor and a Pastoral Counselor.

If you are looking for pastoral counseling, spiritual counseling, or Christian counseling with a Pastor, visit my virtual office right now.

If I am there, click on the chat button and talk to me right now.

If it says "away," then send me an email and tell me what your issue is and when you want to chat.

Got a budget?

I have a super reduced fee for visitors from Talk to a Pastor. For email consultation, only $2.00 for the first email at LivePerson.

If you have an issue and want to talk to someone online about it, you deserve to talk to a professional. If your car needs a mechanic, you want a professional mechanic. If you have a spiritual issue and need some spiritual care giving or pastoral counseling, why talk to just anyone when you can talk to a Senior Pastor.

If you are interested in finding out about pastoral counseling, visit Liveperson.

"Why talk to just anyone when you can talk to a Senior Pastor?" says Pastor Roland who has an earned MS and PhD in Pastoral Psychology.

And I make myself available to people on the internet. I've been helping people via my radio program, books, articles, and private counseling for 21 years.

I offer two service options.

Pay per minute. I offer professional pastoral counseling 7 days a week for personal issues and feedback via texting, phone, and email at LivePerson. Great for people who want to ask a quick question for advice. Great for people who want to be in control of how long the session is. Great for people who want to be anonymous.

Pastoral counseling for a donation. Best value for people who want to chat several times or for multiple email exchanges. Click on the Counseling for a Donation Tab for more information.

We also offer an outstanding array of free audio sermons, articles, a meditation to calm down, and even some free books to read online.

"This is the finest personal pastoral service on the web today."

You don't have to be a Christian to talk to me. I'm just interested in, solutions, recovery, optimal living and solving issues.

The way to get information about pastoral counseling online is to visit Roland's virtual office by clicking on the LivePerson button.

Why wait, or spend gas driving across town? Talk to a someone from the convenience of your home or office. Get professional counseling that fits your budget and schedule.

Roland is the author of 11 books, with 21 years experience. Roland has an earned MS and a PhD in Pastoral Psychology. He is board certified as a professional counselor.

Incidentally, LivePerson is confidential and best yet, it is pay as you go.

Many people prefer pay as you go because it leaves you in complete control of how long the chat session is. The fee is pay as you go per minute. You are in charge of how long or short the visit is. Talk or chat as long or as little as you like. You are in control.

LivePerson also has phone consultation available

For live chat or telephone consultation, pay as you go per minute visit Roland's virtual office at LivePerson.

All you need is a credit card or Paypal. LivePerson makes it easy to get started. Within minutes you are talking or chatting to Roland on a per minute basis. The feedback has been great. People love it!

Live chat and telephone consultation is ultra confidential and anonymous.

LivePerson doe s not give your name or phone number to its professional counselors. Generally for the first consultation, half an hour to an hour is sufficient to receive feedback, explore some solutions, and how to access additional free resources to read or listen to.

* To chat (texting) pay as you go, visit Roland's virtual office at LivePerson.

Follow LivePerson's simple user friendly direction and you'll be chatting within 5 minutes!

Roland is available 7 days a week for your convenience.

"I'm here to help. Whether you just need an outside opinion about a family or relationship issue, or whether you would like some feedback on a personal, private issue, I'm a good listener.

My service is fast, friendly and ultra confidential. Chat in confidence, anonymity, and speak freely. We all need another opinion and feedback sometimes. That's what I'm here for. Chat with me from the convenience of your home 7 days a week.

Many people prefer online counseling to prevent having a mental health record with insurance companies.

I have a Masters Degree in Human Relations and have advanced doctoral

studies in pastoral psychology. I am an ordained minister and I am a counselor and a chaplain. I am the author of 12 books on solving relationship, emotional and stress issues.

I have been advising and providing confidential advice and feedback about life's problems for over 20 years.

Click on the LivePerson button to find out more or talk to Roland now.

The Devil Inside - Possession and Exorcism Are Not Just a Scary Movie - A Pastor's View

2012-01-13T20:09:00.000-08:00

Success in Overcoming PTSD and Bad Memories by the Author Who Overcame Anxiety

2012-01-04T16:01:00.000-08:00

Tired of being unhappy,
Is everything energy sapping?
Would you like to move forward
But you keep looking back
With regret and pain,
And revisiting
Unhappy memories
Again and again?

I want you to see that this is contradictory.
Why would you revisit bad memories
Instead of happy ones?
Why not live them once and move on?

I know the answer but I want you to see
That your mental replays are contradictory.
Living life in the past tense
Doesn't make any sense.

You have a good memory for the bad.
The birds are singing but you are tearful
Cause the past make you sad.
People around you are cheerful
But unfinished business makes you mad.

I want you to see
It's very contradictory.
You want to forget the past,
But remember it compulsively.

There are restorative processes
That can come into play,
Like how a good night's rest sweeps
Trivial memories away.
You wake up fresh and bright
And forget what happened yesterday.

Why are these refreshing processes
Not working on what you would like to forget?

It is because these memories have not been healed
So they can't be swept out.
They house the pain.
And are still crying out
For the right kind of attention.

You look at them with resentment
But until they are looked at with love
They won't give you contentment.

It's unanimous:
Your negative emotions want to be resolved,
And you want the bad memories dissolved.
Let's now look at why your dilemma is not being solved.

Though your body wants to leave the past behind
And so does your mind,
Something is blocking the resolution's unfoldment
And it is something called resentment.

Each memory is not of just of a past scene.
It houses a story and a meaning.
It tells of a story of betrayal or cruelty,
violence, injustice, neglect, being treated unlovingly,
Or something you're not yet ready to see.

Read the whole poem

New Year's Resolutions Never Work - Why I Don't Make New Year's Resolutions

2012-01-01T08:26:00.000-08:00

We can't really change ourselves
Even though we try.
One person gives up alcohol
Then is addicted to shopping at the mall.

One guy gave up cigarettes
Then got hooked on toothpicks instead.

Another decides it's time for a total make over.
But soon is back to the same old chocolate and turnovers.

That's why when a person resolves to change,
A year or two later they're in the same old fix again.

They haven't changed at all inside
They are still hanging onto a shred of pride.
They want their cake and eat it too.
They seek to impose their will on life
Instead of waiting to see
What is God's will for them to do.

So they swap addictions
Or place on themselves many restrictions.
Willing and struggling and growing frustrated,
Eating carrots and lettuce in public
But secretly keeping pie refrigerated.

You can't change your nature inside
No matter what you resolve or decide.
A leopard can't change his spots.
We can only pretend to be what we're not.

New Year's resolutions never work.
A jerk who acts nice is still a jerk.

So what can you do to become a new you?

First change on the inside
It's better than all the make overs you tried.

"But how? But how?" you are going to say.
I will give you the answer right away.

It begins with seeing your wrongs
And wanting to change but not knowing how
And crying out to God to help you now.

The first change will be
Your new response to the wrong
About yourself that you see.
When your conscience wordlessly shows it
Let conscience rub your nose in it.

In the past you resented being shown
The wrong you didn't want to own.
You denied the truth by trying to make yourself right
And pushing your conscience out of sight.

True change begins in the moment
When you are shown something wrong about yourself.
But this time, instead of trying to make yourself right,
You say to conscience's quiet inner light
"Yes, I'm wrong. You are right. "

It's ironic that God makes the biggest from the small.
The acorn a mighty oak tree will grow to be.
The tiny fetus one day will become a dazzling beauty.
And for you, repentance is the biggest change of all
Though it begins in a moment quiet and very small.

The salvation of the world in a lowly stable was born.
And your own salvation begins in a moment when you mourn.

Now can you see why your decisions to change were just denying
God His moment when he was trying
To gently and wordlessly show you your error.
But you resented the message that conscience was bearing.

So the next time you see that you messed up,
Just see it and all your efforts to deny it just stop.
Wait to feel sad, then chastened, then glad.

When your struggle against truth you finally end
You'll discover that conscience is really your friend.

Next time your resent your husband or wife
And you suddenly see that
Resentment is the bane of your life,
Just quietly see that this is true.

Your conscience is not trying to hurt you.
Repentance is God's life giving emotion.
Though He may give you a healthy portion.

Next time you are impatient with your child
And you suddenly see your impatience is wrong,
Bear the pain that is firm but mild.
It is how to God you are reconciled.

And it won't be long
Before one day you'll wake up and see
That your resentment and impatience have departed.
Sheer magic it will be
Without effort on your part.

Just don't resent seeing your error.
The light of conscience is a truth bearer.
When you allow God to repent you,
It become His responsibility to change you too.

You won't need the sweets, drinks or drugs you tried.
When you soften your heart and drop the pride.
It was pride that made you feel needy and empty inside.
Frustration disappears and so does tension and tears.
You'll discover that resentment blocked love all those years.

Tension is gone. You're no longer wrong.
Goodbye doubts and fears!
Hello sunshine and the robin's song!

True change begins in the moment
When you are shown something wrong about yourself.
But this time, instead of trying to make yourself right,
You say to conscience's quiet inner light
"Yes, I'm wrong. You are right. "

This work by Roland Trujillo is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Talk to a Preacher, Pastor, Pauper, Poet - Online Pastor Will Give You an Answer Before You Know It

2011-12-31T08:44:00.000-08:00

The Talk to a Pastor Poem
by Michael Carlos Simon

Free chat with a pastor?
Ask Pastor Roland a question,
And he will give you an answer.

From Copenhagen to Key Largo,
From New York to Chicago,
Over in Ghana,
and South of Lackawana,
Ask Pastor Roland.

My boyfriend wants to live together.
Do pastors always say "Never?"

Ask Pastor Roland.

What about Christian rock and tattoos?
In church, is it wrong to snooze?

Bible Question? Pastor says yes.
Find out for sure, you don't have to guess.

What's the purpose of life?
Why is there so much strife?

I don't know,
I'll ask Pastor Roland.

Got a question about religion?
Told a lie or cheated a smidgeon?
.
Got relationship issues?
Quit crying in your tissues.
Just ask Pastor Roland.

If you're dealing with a lot of stress?
And your apartment is a mess,
Don't hesitate,
There's no need to wait.
Ask Pastor Roland how to meditate.

Should I tell my kids about Santa Claus?
Was Jesus the greatest man who ever was?
When my cat died, where did she go?
Does anyone really know?

I'll ask Pastor Ro.

I'm taking drugs, but I really want hugs.
When I ask questions, everyone shrugs.

Who else will do this for free?
Pastor Roland is there for thee.

So get your question ready.
Hold your Ipad steady.
Click on the keyboard image,
And don't forget to eat your spinach.

He's got you covered in San Francisco,
Kansas and Texas,
Hello Frisco.
Rio, Toronto and Timbuktu,
Pastor Roland has answers for you,
And maybe a blessing too.

Hi, this is Pastor Roland. I hope you enjoyed the poem by my good friend Mike.

I love free chat because I get to communicate with friends from countries all over the world. Talk to a Pastor Online has friends in Nigeria, Ghana, Australia, India, Brazil and Jamaica - just to name a few.

Need prayer? Got a question you would like to ask a pastor? You have come to the right place.

Welcome to Chat with a Pastor

Chat with a Pastor is friendly, informative and educational.
If you would like to ask a pastor a question, you have come to the right place.
I have answered questions from friends around the world about a variety of topics. People ask me about tattoos, relationships, music, Bible questions, coping with stress, college, prayers, television, and much more. Lots of parenting questions too, like should kids have a cell phone, should parents let their kids play video games, is college for everyone, home schooling and more. I'm always glad to help.

Before we begin, I just need to mention a few rules.
1. You must be 18.
2. No bedroom questions.
3. I cannot do counseling at free chat (but you can ask if pastoral counseling is right for you). Chat with a Pastor is for educational purposes only.
4. No emergencies, violence, crises or abuse issues.

So, if you are ready to get started, click on the link below (or on the picture of the keyboard in the right sidebar) Please text responsibly. Click To Chat

Prefer email?

Send us your email questions

Pastor loves email questions (and words of thanks or encouragement too!) Pastor is not always in for chat, but emails are 24 hours a day 7 days a week. Same rules: no emergencies, crises, violence or abuse issues. Not all questions can be answered.

Get an eBook as our gift

For a small donation receive an eBook as a token of my appreciation.

This is our New Year special. Here's how it works -

1. Click on the keyboard image (to the right) to talk to me.

Get your question answered, feedback, prayer or friendly advice.

2. Afterwards, if you would like a free eBook (such as The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage) Click on here and donate what you can afford using safe, secure Paypal

3. You will receive an email telling you where to get your free eBook on improving your relationship, gaining confidence and overcoming stress, finding the joyous spiritual walk, or a fun parenting book.

4. Feel good.

Thanks for helping me help others and receive your eBook as our gift. Thank you and may God Bless.

Parenting Book for Dads

2011-12-30T15:14:00.000-08:00

Santa and Mrs. Claus are master mentors when it comes to parenting. Want a good read? Would you like to follow Santa and Mrs. Claus as they deal with parenting issues with love and wisdom?

It's better than attending a class and you don't even have to leave home or use any gas.

Ideal for dads, new dads, and new grandpas too. An ideal gift because it is a good read, and its positive parenting message is easy to digest.

(If you want a book for dads and step dads of of teens and older kids, a very good book is My Daughter Does Not Want to Clean Her Room - a Handbook for Parents and Kids, available in eBook and in quality paperback.)

I know what you are going to say, because I have heard it before.

I even heard it from a nice lady who was a receptionist at an office I used to visit. I told her that I was writing a book about parenting.

"What are you writing about right now?" she asked.

I said: "Right now I'm writing about how awful it is to force a child to stay in her room just because she was a little slow in cleaning her room. "

She said: "That's what I do with my daughter. I make her stay in her room."

I shook my head. This nice lady has thick glasses on, and I could see a picture behind her desk of a little angelic looking girl with thick glasses on (I'm guessing this was her daughter).

I said, "Why don't you try patience?"

Do you know what she said?

She said, "I tried patience and it doesn't work!"

I assured her that patience does work.

You see--she, like so many other parents, doesn't think that patience will work.

It's because she never gave it a chance. No wonder she says it doesn't work.

You see, patience never fails.

Well, here's something I know for sure. Patience=love.

So now I am going to prove to you that patience does work.

I know that if I can convince you that patience works, both you and your child will be much happier.

All you have to do is preview the first 40 or 50 pages free and you will have discovered several strategies that are based in patience and that really work.

I will be happy if Santa helps improve your relationship with your child.

Written in the tradition of LePetit Prince and Jonathan Livingston Seagull, this magical little book is the best kept secret in parenting literature. It can be read as a heart warming story; but like Le Petit Prince, it also is filled with profound insights and meaning.

Santa's Take on Parenting can be read over and over. It has the amazing quality of sparking new insight each time it is read. It makes a great gift.

But don't take my word for it. Read it for yourself.

Preview online at Scribd in eBook format for a discount

Shadow Santa and Mrs. Claus as they demonstrate their skills in gently but firmly guiding two kids with issues who are visiting with them.

Find out the secrets to their success.

Discover what Santa's skills are and why they work.

Let Santa and Mrs. Claus be your mentors!

Incidentally, just as parenting is a year round job, so is learning and developing your parenting skills! Don't wait until the holidays.

"Dr. Roland Trujillo PhD and Senior Pastor has written the book (now at Amazon.com) on alternatives to spanking. It is called Santa's Take on Parenting: Secrets from the North Pole. It will actually mentor you in learning how to apply patience and wisdom in working with your kids. It is also one of the sweetest books ever written and is right up there with Miracle on 34th Street as an all time reminder of what love is all about. "

"Little kids don't need discipline, they need direction and redirection. They need watching with love, kindness, and patience. Older kids need the loving presence of an involved aware parent. They need mentoring, coaching, and a parent who sets a good example. I'm going to tell you the truth. Time outs or spanking are poor substitutes for patience and wisdom.
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Written in the tradition of Le Petit Prince and Jonathan Livingston Seagull, this beautiful little book can be read as a heart warming story; but like Le Petit Prince, it also is filled with profound insights and meaning. Santa's Take on Parenting can be read over and over, and it makes a great gift.

Shadow Santa and Mrs. Claus as they demonstrate their skills in gently but firmly guiding two kids who are visiting with them.

Find out the secrets to their success.

Discover what Santa's skills are and why they work.

Let Santa and Mrs. Claus be your mentors!

Incidentally, just as parenting is a year round job, so is learning and developing your parenting skills! Don't wait until the holidays.

Click here to preview at Amazon.com in both quality paperback and in Kindle.

Now at Barnes and Noble Nookbook. In color!

I know that if I can convince you that patience works, both you and your child will be much happier.

All you have to do is preview the first 40 or 50 pages free and you will have discovered several strategies that are based in patience and that really work.

I will be happy if Santa helps improve your relationship with your child.

Shadow Santa and Mrs. Claus as they demonstrate their skills in gently but firmly guiding two kids with issues who are visiting with them.

Find out the secrets to their success.

Discover what Santa's skills are and why they work.

Let Santa and Mrs. Claus be your mentors!

Incidentally, just as parenting is a year round job, so is learning and developing your parenting skills! Don't wait until the holidays.

.

Santa's Take on Parenting: Secrets from the North Pole

.What does Santa have to say about homework, discipline, and chores?
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Santa Claus has finally spoken on the subject of parenting. Who is better suited to give advice than the one who has brought joy and delight to children for as long as anyone can remember?
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In this modern day Santa story for parents, the reader follows Santa and Mrs. Claus as they work with a couple of kids who come to stay with them. The results are positive and inspirational, as Santa teaches by example how patience and creativity can make parenting a lot more fun and easy.

"In this fun filled educational book, the author introduces innovative parenting strategies by using the power of story telling to take the reader on a fictional visit with Santa and Mrs. Claus. The reader learns how Santa and Mrs. Claus handle issues that arise with a pair of youngsters who spend a few months with the Clauses."
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What are "time outs Santa Style?"
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How does Santa solve discipline and communication issues?
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What's on Santa's do's and don'ts list?
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Click Here to Look Inside!

What is Santa's secret to making chores fun and easy?
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What does Santa say to parents about getting off to a good start?
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You'll find the answers to these questions and more in this book, destined to become a classic. Roland's new book is a Santa story for grownups with many teachable moments.

Santa's Take on Parenting is a handbook for parents. It has many new, easy to use creative solutions to typical kids issues.

But it is also a fun read and a good story. For example, you will also find out

What does Mrs. Claus do?
What does Mrs. Claus feed Santa?
What is Santa's favorite snack
What does Santa look like?
Does Santa use a computer
What sitting in Santa's sleigh is like
And much more

What others are saying about Santa's Take

"Every parent should read this book."
--Suzy, real estate broker, San Francisco, CA

"Your book is great and should go over well."
Dee, principal, Anderson, CA

“Santa's Take on Parenting" is a real find. I was looking for a book that makes the case for positive and creative parenting without spanking or excessive reliance on punishment.
I plan to provide a copy to my moms and dads who are just getting started or soon to be parents. I also wish to make it "required reading" for parents who need some coaching in positive parenting. Santa's Take will make learning about parenting fun and easier for lots of busy parents.
— Mary, parent educator, Emeryville, CA.

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“Whimsical" After I read Santa's Take on Parenting, I gave a copy to my adoptive and foster parent agency to have in their lending library. — Alicia, mother of three, Northern California

Your kids will listen when you say "Santa says."
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.Ideal for parents, grandparents, foster parents and anyone who loves kids.
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Order the beautiful quality paperback edition at Amazon.com as a gift for someone you love
.

10% of every dollar is donated directly to needy shelters for people (and pets too)!

.

and now available for Kindle too!

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A Word to Parents, Foster Parents and Grandparents
The Issue:

You like giving books as gifts, but you want to give a book that is fun and useful. You need a book for a dad, a mom, a teenage mom, a friend, or someone who just works with kids.

The Solution:

Santa's Take on Parenting reads like a novel, is good for both moms and dads, has dozens of parenting tips, and is fun to read.

The Issue:

You know someone who could use some fresh ideas for dealing with their kids. But you don't want to be intrusive or raise resistance.

The Solution:

Santa's Take on Parenting is a fun read and it has lots of creative positive ideas without being heavy handed. It can be read as a good story or as a parenting book.

No Particular Issue, you're just interested in parenting and want to read a good book.

The Solution: Santa's Take on Parenting

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Use this special link, and 20% of every dollar will be donated directly to needy shelters for people (and pets too!)

.

"Hello, this is Pastor Roland. This new contact form is provided by Emailmeform. Hope you like it." Remember - you must be 18. No crises or emergencies, no violence or abuse issues. Contact Form Please type your question for Pastor Roland in the Question area. By using this form you are confirming that you are at least 18 years of age.
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Dear Pastor Roland,